The 4th trimester is a time of adjustment, especially if you have other children to consider. When a new baby arrives, not only does the family dynamic change, but also the role of older siblings within the family. The youngest may start to regress in behavior. Older children may begin to feel left-out or harbor jealousy toward the newest family member.
But with a little preparation and a lot of communication, parents can help make the transition easier for everyone and even get older kids excited and eager to help with the new baby.
Helping older kids adjust to a new baby sibling
Combat sibling jealousy when the new baby arrives
A boost in confidence can have a significant impact on how your older child reacts and responds to the stress of a new or changing situation like the arrival of a new baby. Point out times when the baby is watching or listening intently to an older sibling. Let your older child know how much the new baby looks up to them or smiles when they come near. Parents may also notice behavior regressions in older kids. There may also be a resurgence of bickering between older siblings when a new baby comes home.
Mom of four Yadira Thabatah agrees that regular communication and encouragement can help combat sibling rivalry and jealousy no matter how old they are.
“We’ve also always emphasized the importance of using our words, especially when we’re upset,” Thabatah told Mom.com. “Every sibling has their rivalry here and there, but they’re really good at discussing their feelings and talking things out. They all look out for each other and it’s just so sweet to see them resolve their conflicts and come out the better for it.”
One-on-one time, if possible, is also recommended if you can swing it mentally and physically. “Make time to spend with just them,” Oneill suggested. “Even if it is just time to read a book together. It isn’t always going to eliminate jealousy, but it helps show them you haven’t stopped loving them.”
