What to Know
There is one thing you could always count on the Duggar family for on 19 Kids and Counting, and that was regular courtships. The family prides itself on the belief that the children should date with the intention of marriage, rather than date around throughout their teen years. And when Jinger Duggar opened up about how long some courtships can take, as outlined in pre-ordained rules, people wondered if she was talking about older sister Jana Duggar.
Jana is the oldest Duggar sister and she was much older when she got married than her younger sisters were when they were married. Jessa Duggar was 21 when she got married, Jinger was 22, and Jill Duggar was 23. By comparison, Jana was 34 when she got married. Now, per Jinger’s podcast, some of those who have followed the famous reality TV for years think they finally understand why.
Jana Duggar might have had to wait long to be allowed to be in a courtship.
@jingerandjeremy 😳 #jingervuolo #jingerandjeremy #iblp #purity #purityculture ♬ original sound – The Jinger & Jeremy Podcast
In the clip from Jinger and Jeremy’s podcast, Jinger speaks about someone setting rules in place for some courtships, depending on the people. She explains that some people are predetermined to have to wait for what could be years before they are allowed to enter into courtships.
“He would often have so many rules, even around courtship,” she says. “So there were courtships instead of traditional dating. And he even had times where…He pushed a single service commitment, which is where you are committing before God to stay single, to not date, to not court anybody, for a certain number of years. So some people would be like, two years, five years, 10 years long commitments people would make, which is just completely wrong. And they would make these commitments and then have to hold to it. And then he would be like, OK, now when you’re courting, you have to follow all these rules for purity.”
In the video, it’s not immediately clear who the “he” is that Jinger is referring to. Some users in the comments wrote that she is referencing dad Jim Bob Duggar. Others believe she is referring to Bill Gothard, the former leader of the Institute in Basic Life Principles. Either way, people believe Jinger was low-key ousting Jana for how long she had to wait to have a courtship.
“I assume this was what happened to Jana,” one user commented on the TikTok video.
Another added, “I want Jana’s story the most of all the siblings.”
Other users agreed that it could be Jana that Jinger is referencing since she does mention 10 years. Jana and her now-husband courted once, then split up, and began a courtship again years later.
Jana met her husband years before they started courting.
Jana and Stephen first met in 2011. They dated, or courted, in 2021. However, that was also around the time that Josh Duggar was in serious legal trouble for charges related to possessing child sexual abuse material. Jana and Stephen split up, which is typically unheard of with courtships, especially in the Duggar family.
It wasn’t until 2024 that the pair reconnected again. The on again/off again courtship raised some red flags for those who follow the Duggar family. However, after Jana and Stephen began courting more seriously, they did finally get married.
People speculated about why Jana and her husband split up initially.
There is some speculation about why the courtship didn’t work out the first time. Could it have been because Jana was told she had to wait longer to be in a courtship and get married? That’s entirely possible. She also wrote in the comments under an Instagram post once that she was “picky” before. According to a Reddit post, though, there are other possible reasons.
“So she’s saying she had to lower her standards…I’m sure her husband loves that for him,” someone commented on the Reddit thread.
Another Redditor wrote, “Well who were the other 2,137 potential candidates? Also did she choose him because he was the only one left or her father made her pick one and he seemed the most decent choice?”
“The unschooling and having mentally ill parents created a cold, direct personality for Jana (younger siblings are much warmer like Johanna and shielding/parenting by older siblings plays a big role in this), and this is the perfect example with the vague wording,” a user added. “I think she’s trying to be honest but we’re not getting the full story.”
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