I’m a mom of four, three daughters, and a son. Over the years, our family has received so many comments about our children’s genders. For starters, they feel sorry for my son, the lone boy among three sisters. We’ve been told he needs some male interaction. One person even suggested we adopt one more child, and we should make sure that child is a boy to keep my son “company.”
The assumption is that my son is missing out on important masculinity lessons and experiences because he doesn’t have any brothers. I find this so odd, mostly because he is perfectly content being the sole brother. He has no issue with hopping into whatever game or activity his sisters are partaking in at any given time. He will play Calico Critters with his little sister, a game of football with his next older sister, or sit at his oldest sister’s desk and use her art supplies. He has the family he needs.
Which brings me to my daughters
There’s also nothing wrong with a daughter who likes what she likes
If her preference is tiaras and dance class, great. But if she wants to join a karate class and prefers to wear blue, that’s fine too. At least, it should be.
Kids don’t exist to fulfill their parents’ dreams. If we push our children to be a certain way in order for them to feel loved and accepted, we create shame. We also miss out on watching our children blossom into their individual selves — a true atrocity.
My daughters who aren’t “girly” are no less valuable, because they have chosen to be themselves, breaking the stereotypical molds. I will continue to support my children as they figure out who they want to become, empowering them to enjoy the journey.
