Ladies: Stop faking orgasms! Now! Just stop! You're giving men the wrong idea …
A recent New York Post article suggests that most men — 85 percent, in fact — believe they satisfied their woman even when they most certainly didn't. Only 64 percent of women say their last roll in the hay ended in an orgasm.
The Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University conducted the study, which interviewed 5,865 Americans ages 14 to 94 about their sexual habits, and they found that, yes, men really are as clueless as we all thought … just kidding. Not really.
Ladies, if it is not working for you, speak up! Faking an orgasm means you're partially to blame for the bad sex.
Want better sex? Communicate!
We can debate all day about whether an orgasm is needed to make sex mutually satisfying. I'm firmly in the camp that feels it's necessary. I've had good sex without one, but toe-curling, screaming, come back for more sex only happens when we both get to finish.
There are some women who cannot have vaginal orgasms from intercourse alone and others who can. It's a controversial topic, to be sure. But either way, there are techniques and steps a man can take toward not completely striking out in the bedroom. And we ladies can help him get there if we put our big girl pants on.
Instead of pretending like everything is fantabulous, tell him, "This is not working for me." Say it in front of a mirror to practice.
If you don't like that, try positive reinforcement: "I really like it when you" or just moan and say, "Keep going, just like that …"
Also, send non-verbal clues. Move your body away if something doesn't work and lean in when it does. If your man is astute, he will get it.
We can't expect a guy to actually be good in bed if we don't speak up. Don't like it when he wears his black dress socks to bed? Then by all means, tell him! Don't just hate it and complain to your girlfriends while he thinks he's a total stud.
That makes you complicit! Let's not stand for it. Be honest. Be brave. And you will get better sex for your effort.
What do you do to get better sex?
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