What to Know
When are men going to realize that being incompetent as dads is not cute? A dad on TikTok, Elliot, doesn’t quite get that, as evidenced in a video he posted where he jokes about how bad he is at his kids’ school for events like meet the teacher or a walk-through. He points out that his wife is asking the right questions while all he wants to do is shoot some hoops on the playground. I guess the response is supposed to be something along the lines of, “Men, they are just so silly.” But, uh, no. The internet is not giving him this one.
In the comments under the TikTok, users questioned why his sentiment is acceptable. Some also pointed out how it seems to be a universal belief and expectation for women to be “good” at these things, while men are able to just skirt by and be praised for the bare minimum. Hey, maybe Elliot is a great dad and a present partner. But this video has people taking a different message away from it.
The dad seems to think it’s funny he would rather shoot hoops than meet the teacher.
@exoelliot Truth?
♬ original sound – exoelliot
In the video, Elliot speaks to the camera, seemingly with his wife and one or more of their kids nearby. He jokes about how dads shouldn’t go to the first day of school events because they are more prone to getting distracted.
“This is why you never send dads to first day of school tour of the campus type s–t,” he says. “‘Cause they’re like talking to the teachers and I’m like a kid in LA LA land looking at the basketball hoop. I think this is only for moms.”
Yeah, that last line especially got him in deep with other users on TikTok. Whether he meant it as a joke, or even a joke at his own expense, people took it to mean that Elliot sees these sorts of things as business for moms and that dads should have a pass to be as free spirited and whimsical as they want.
“Can’t handle the first day of school but they make laws for our bodies,” one woman commented, about Elliot but also men in general.
Another wrote, “Why is being an active and present parent only for women?”
Others pointed out that they see “weaponized incompetence” in the video. Someone else commented, “It’s not even kind of funny…”
“Weaponized incompetence is so old,” another person added. “This is part of being an involved parent regardless of if it’s the mom or dad.”
Some followers came to the creator’s defense.
Elliot often makes content about being a dad, parenting with his wife, and taking care of their seven kids. So the users, and his followers, who have supported him quickly came to his defense in the comments under the video. Yes, the haters sort of outweighed the supporters, but they were there, ready to go to bad for the dad despite the nature of the video and the implication of him, as a dad, just being no good at school events.
One such supporter wrote, “You all have clearly never watched any of his content! His is very engaged with his kids and wife. He talks a lot about the work he does on himself to always be at his best for himself and his family.”
He later responded to the backlash.
@exoelliot Please watch it all @Mercedes ♬ original sound – exoelliot
After the video sparked a pretty lively debate, Elliot posted another video. In it, he explains where he was coming from. He addresses claims from another creator and, it seems, from comments about men being in charge of women’s bodies and who people believe Elliot is, based off that video.
“I’m a man that never tries to convince anybody that I’m a leader, nor do I make laws. I promise you that. Because if I did, a lot of s–t wouldn’t be happening,” he says. “I don’t listen to podcasts. I listen to audible books because I suck at reading, and that’s a fact. You could ask anybody around me. I don’t ever make choices about women nor their bodies. I have four daughters. Oldest is 22, youngest is 12, everything in between. And I have a wife. It’s disrespectful to me.”
He also explains that he “wasn’t meaning anything malicious” in his original post. He just recorded the video after he went through an hour walk-through with his wife and daughter and, according to Elliot, it was something he felt in the moment.
And honestly, the bit in his original video about these kinds of events being “only for moms” is what did it for some. So maybe if he hadn’t added that, this wouldn’t have been such a huge deal.
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