I was 6 when it happened to me. I was excited about Christmas when my older brother gave me a withering look and told me flatly that Santa was just for babies and he wasn't actually real. Older brothers are the worst! And I spent the rest of the holiday season in tears and upset. How could my whole world have been a lie? Though, I guess I have to consider myself lucky … there were other kids who found out in ways that were worse — much worse.
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The truth is that for all kids who believe in Santa, there will come a moment when that belief is shaken or broken forever. For some kids, that moment is shocking or sad. For some kids (or at least their parents), that moment can be kind of hilarious. But no matter what, everyone needs to learn the downright sad truth that Santa isn't real someday. I just hope for everyone else's sake, they have an older brother who is more gentle with them!
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Read on for 11 stories about the surprising, embarrassing, and totally hilarious ways that the little kids found out the big truth about Santa Claus. Just keep this list away from kids who are still trying to keep the magic alive. Ho ho ho? More like no, no, no!
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Stocking Stuffer
"My husband and I have an annual tradition: Christmas Eve, after the kids are down, we meet at the Christmas tree and he, um, 'stuffs my stocking.' The Christmas lights are romantic! What can I say?
Well, you can guess where this is going, right? We were getting busy and one of the kids heard the rustling of paper and snuck down the stair to see her dad (wearing a Santa hat) and mom partially naked under the tree. It was traumatic for everyone.
She is 17 now and still calls that night 'The time when you ruined Santa forever.' Sorry, kid!" — Shelby D., Lansing, Michigan
Dream Killer
"I have twin boys. One of them is dreamy and imaginative. One of them is super literal and a very concrete thinker. The first kid loved Santa and all the magic of Christmas. The second one was suspicious from like age 2.
Last year my Santa believer came to me crying and said that his brother told him that Santa wasn't real. He was devastated. I told him to hold on and went to talk to his brother. I tried to patiently explain to kid #2 about how it isn't nice to tell other kids that and that his brother wants to believe, etc.
Kid #2 listens, nods, and marches out to where his brother was crying on the couch and says, 'Okay. Santa WAS real. But now he is dead. Do you feel better?'
He did not, in fact, feel better. My wife and I joke that our son's nickname is Dream Killer." — Laurie R., Greensville, Kansas
Passed Out Santa
"Last year we got my daughter this big dollhouse for her Santa gift. The plan was to set it up on Christmas Eve so she could play with it right away on Christmas morning.
It turned out to be really complicated to put it together. My husband was in charge of it and I guess he got tired (or had too much spiked egg nog) but he fell asleep half way through. My daughter came downstairs and found her dad, dead asleep, amidst all the parts of the doll house and a tag that read 'from Santa.' The jig was up." — Andrea P., Inver Grove Heights, Minnesota
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The Surprising Gift
"My family tradition is that my mom always buys and wraps the Santa gift for the kids. That way there is different wrapping paper and a different signature on the tag. Smart, right?
Until last year. My son, who was sort of on the edge about the whole Santa thing, opened his gift and was like 'Um, thanks? I guess?'
Turns out my mom put his tag on the wrong gift. He figured out Santa wasn't real because he didn't ask for a boxed set of Law & Order DVDs." — Christine S., Boise, Idaho
The Family Next Door
"When my son was 6, an Orthodox Jewish family moved in next door. My son became fast friends with one of their little boys. All was well. Then came Christmas. My son noticed that they didn't have a Christmas tree (of course) and asked my dad, who is a pastor, about it. As they talked, my son suddenly asked, 'Wait– does this mean Santa doesn't visit them?'
My dad said yes, basically, and my son looked at him and blurted out, 'Well, that's BULLSH*T!'
I was so mortified and my kid never said he believed in Santa ever again." — Renee G., Saint Paul, Minnesota
Letter of Truth
"My son was starting to question the Santa thing but I really wanted him to still believe, mostly because I didn't want him to wreck it for his sister. How he found out the truth was actually pretty clever — he set us up!
He gave me his letter to Santa and I got him the number one gift he had on it — a particular video game. On Christmas morning he opened it and said 'I knew it was you!' Turns out he had given us a letter asking for that gift but put a 'real' letter in the mail to Santa with a different gift on it. Too smart for his own good!" — Emily E., Norman, Oklahoma
Reindeer Problems
"My daughter casually told me that she didn't believe in Santa anymore. I asked her why and she said that she could believe in him but 'the whole reindeer thing — it just doesn't add up!'
She basically decided from her science class that the physics of the reindeer didn't work so Santa can't be real. She's gonna be a scientist, this one." — Lexi S., Des Moines, Iowa
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Mr. Naughty
"When he was in first grade, my son had a rough year. For a variety of reasons, he was having some behaviour issues at home and school. I didn't realize how much it effected him until Christmas morning. He opened his Santa present but didn't seem that excited about it. I kept asking him what was wrong and then he said 'I don't think Santa is real. If he was, I would be on the naughty list.'
Well. That just broke my heart and I burst into tears. Full on ugly crying. My crying freaked him out, so he started crying and that made me cry more and then he cried so hard that he barfed on the Christmas tree.
It was AWFUL at the time but now that he is a teenager it is one of our funniest family memories. We like the dark humor, I guess." — Mary Jo B., Cleveland, Ohio
Break-Up Letter
"My daughter told me she was working on her letter to Santa, but I was not prepared when she handed it to me. I still have it. It says, basically, 'Dear Santa, I'm sorry but I don't believe in you any more. Love, Kasey.'
She wrote him a break-up letter!" — Kelli B., New Rochelle, New York
Santa Wish
"When my oldest was about 6, we did the whole Santa visit at the mall thing. He refused to tell me what he asked Santa for. All I knew was that it made Santa laugh.
Christmas morning comes and my son comes downstairs and sees me nursing the baby and his face just crumples. Turns out he asked Santa to 'take back' his little brother because he 'cried too much.' That pretty much ruined Santa for him." — Terrie, Bowling Green, Kentucky
Check the Tags
"My son figured out that I was Santa when he opened his present and discovered that I forgot to remove the clearance stickers from the bottom of the toy. He looked at me and said, 'Santa is a cheap-o!'
Yes, he is. Yes he is." — Brynn D., Tucson, Arizona
