Kids saying the darnedest things is nothing new, but until it happens to you as a parent, you never quite fully understand the depth of humiliation they're capable of. A lot of times, parents and their kids have an understanding around language — when your kid calls something it isn't, but you know what it means, you often adapt to just letting it go. Although that can totally work within the walls of your own home, it sometimes has unexpected repercussions in public.
As one dad recently discovered, kids can totally broadcast the wrong message to the masses at the most inconvenient times.
In a Reddit post, the dad explained it all started because of a specific pair of underwear he has.
"So I have a pair of underwear that has a Valentine’s Day theme," he explained. "My son, being 3, does not consider this particular undergarment to be especially masculine. I mean hey, we all have our tastes… but I’d really prefer if he wouldn’t run outside and scream at my daughter, for the whole neighborhood to hear, 'COME LOOK! DADDY'S WEARING GIRL UNDIES AGAIN!!'"
C'mon, you have to admit -- that's pretty hysterical.
The short and sweet post inspired other parents to share mortifying tales that they have suffered at the hands of their well-meaning children.
One fellow father shared in solidarity that his son put his, uh, 'business' out there for an entire shop to hear.
"I'm circumcised, my then 4 yo isn't. We went to a Dunkin' Donuts one day; the only people there are a couple of teenage girls and my son, as gleefully as loud as possible, yells 'Hey, someone cut my daddy's penis off!!!! Show them!! Show them!!' And that was one awkward donut exchange."
Another parent said their kid definitely made them look like questionable role models to their classroom during a lesson on the alphabet.
"When my eldest was in kindergarten they were reviewing the alphabet — a is for apple, b is for banana etc. They get to m and my kid yells margaritas — m is for margaritas! But he is wrong?"
I mean, the kid isn't wrong.
Not to be outdone, one mom shared how her daughter discovered male anatomy in the most embarrassing way possible.
"My family was at a beach and my husband, me and our then 3 year old daughter were all together in an open-air changing stall (doors, but open top and bottom), changing clothes, and my daughter takes that opportunity to notice for the first time that her dad has a penis by yelling 'Dada, what’s dat thing you got hanging down dere?' Oh, the snickers and gaffaws from all around us."
Moral of the story, parents?
Little ears are ALWAYS listening. And they will always take the best/worst opportunity to expose you. Best be on your game.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
