Babies are unpredictable creatures. You never know when they will be hungry, tired, or need a diaper changed. If you have been out of the house with a baby who needs a diaper change, you also know that not everywhere is baby-friendly, and it can make changes kind of a pain. What do you do if there is no changing table? You have to improvise.
A poster in Reddit's AITA forum encountered a woman changing her baby in public and was totally grossed out. Not because the baby needed to be changed, but because the mom decided to change her in the middle of a restaurant at the lunch counter where they were eating. So, the Original Poster, aka OP, told her to move, and the mom was ticked. Not surprisingly, it turned into a whole thing, and now the OP is wondering if they overreacted.
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The OP wanted to fuel up after a workout.
The OP stopped at a restaurant after hitting the gym for a quick bite. The restaurant is small, but there are a few tables and seats at a counter, the OP explained in the post. The place was a bit busy, so the OP found a seat at the counter and ordered lunch. While the OP was eating, a woman came to the counter and began to change her baby without a care in the world.
"She put the bag on the counter right next to me, then spread out some kind of mat. It hit me what she was planning to do, so I said-very politely-'if you need to change the baby, there's a restroom right behind you'. She said 'Yes, I know, but there's no changing table and I don't want to put the mat on the floor. It'll get dirty'. My response was 'Please do not change your baby's diaper on the counter where I am eating my lunch,'" the OP wrote.
The mom wasn't having it.
The aggravated mother said it wasn't a big deal.
She played the "It's a baby" card, presumably so that the OP would back off. But that's not what happened.
The OP told her, "I don't want to look at or smell this while I am eating, You have a table in the front-change her there if you don't want to use the restroom to do it."
The mom didn't back down, so the OP called a manager to deal with it.
"I finally went to the front counter, asked the staff to deal with her and waited while they did. She ended up storming out, threatening to 'write it all up on Nextdoor' (which is an absolute cesspit of fingerpointing and gossip if you aren't aware of it) and never go to that restaurant again. And I went back and finished my lunch," the OP explained.
So, who was the a–hole in this situation?
Redditors were all in on this one.
People couldn't believe this woman put the baby down right where the OP was eating. They didn't like the mother's attitude.
"NTA. The level of entitlement from her is off the charts," one person wrote. "Her wet baby is your and the restaurant's problem because she didn't want to lay the mat on the floor? That's insane. The mat is made to keep the baby from touching a surface. That's exactly what it would do, then you wash the mat."
Plenty agreed.
"Jesus, hygiene violation at 2 o'clock! Nta and she had an option to change the baby in the restroom, her argument about the mat needing to stay clean is redundant as h— when there's an diaper full baby waste product about to touch it and a squirming dirt magnet on top," someone else commented. "Nta, she was arrogant and the worst kind of parent out there."
"What an absolute disgusting thing to even go through a parent's head!! This is coming from a parent and a grandparent!" another person wrote. "I would NEVER change a baby on any table, at home, in public, or in a park!! Use the bathroom, use the seat in a car, anywhere other than a dining area."
One person had a similar experience and felt the same way as the OP.
"I once went to my local Subway sandwich shop, and someone was changing a baby on one of the dining tables. I objected, and the staff just shrugged. Apparently some people think this is normal," the person shared. "If it were today, I'd take a photo, and send it to the health inspector. So gross!"
Plenty of parents have dealt with inconvenient diaper changes.
Poop happens, and parents deal with it all the time. Redditors thought this woman was way off.
One mom wrote, "disgusting. When my son was a baby, I had to change his diaper when we were at a restaurant with my parents. It was a tiny bathroom with nowhere to change him except the floor, so I shrugged, set the mat down and changed him on the floor. No big deal. ♀️"
"I've been in that mom's situation more than once with my daughter. Never even considered changing her diaper at a table where people eat, as that would be an AH move," another comment reads. "What I (and other moms I know) did, was taking her pram to a quiet corner of the restaurant and change the diaper in the pram. Later when she was a toddler and we didn't take the pram everywhere we would use pull up diapers that we could change standing up. NTA."
People thought the mom had plenty of other options.
"I've changed many diapers in the back seat, or load area of my SUV when there was no good place to do it inside. I sure as heck wouldn't expect someone to sit next to me while changing a diaper!" someone wrote.
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OP, you were definitely justified.
Not a single person could believe the mom's audacity. Although some empathized with her struggle, they all believed she could have done better. The fact that the mom was totally aloof to how unsanitary it was to change her daughter on a restaurant table is pretty mind-blowing.
Look, we're moms. We get that when nature calls, we have to answer – but not next to someone's lunch. That's so, so gross.
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