Everyone parents differently — but one parent is really stirring up the internet after sharing some of the controversial ways they raise their kids. TikToker @cptsdwhisperer, whose pronouns are they/them, recently won cheers from the internet after sharing that they allow their kids to curse, but things really got interesting when the parent of eight admitted they won’t raise their kids to follow gender norms.
The parent shared their spiciest parenting takes in a video that has over 1 million views from December 7, 2021.
Like the fact that they allow their kids to take mental health days off from school, and the language allowed — “my kids curse. a lot,” — and the big one, “we don’t follow traditional gender roles,” they wrote in the video’s captions.
Other “controversial” things the parent does: They don’t force their kids to sit on Santa’s lap. It’s “their body, their choice (goes for just about everything),” and “self expression is encouraged,” they wrote in a follow up video.
But the one that might surprise people is that "Gender identity is 100% up to each individual child."
The TikToker is non-binary themselves, which, they explained in a video from July 11, 2021, is something they’ve recently come to terms with. And in a follow-up video, they shared that they believe we all shouldn’t be so quick to push kids into gender norms as soon as they’re born.
If the parent were to have another baby tomorrow, their family “wouldn’t gender that baby until they were old enough to decide on their own what they felt like,” they explained.
Most people thought the parent was doing everything right.
“The fact that people take this things as controversial is just messed up.. its literaly the basic things to do as a parent,” wrote one commenter.
“You’ve said ‘controversial’. Still waiting,” another commenter joked.
“I follow all your ‘controversial’ rules. Feel like I’m on a good path…” a third commenter chimed in.
In another video, the parent explained that they see gender identity as part of teaching their kids consent.
“The most controversial way I teach my kids consent is that they all choose their gender identity because it’s every person’s right to be who they are,” they explained. “It’s that simple.”
In a response video to someone who asked how the parent “[handles] the gender roles,” Cptsdwhisperer explained that “it’s just kind of do as you want, what makes you feel good, but just as an example currently right now I am installing flooring in our house and my husband is cooking us dinner in the kitchen.”
“Do what makes you happy, that’s all that really matters,” they added.
Sounds like good, solid advice.
