Once you become a parent, it should be perfectly acceptable to use the word "kids" as an excuse for everything. Why are you tired? Kids. Why are you angry? Kids. What are you sad about? Kids. Why are you late? Don't even ask.
The answer is now and forever will be, kids. They are the worst. Just kidding. We think kids are the best. But we also think they cause all of the tardiness.
A TikTok mom went on an epic rant about being late to drop her daughter off at school, and trust us when we say it will have every parent in the world yelling, "Same, momma. Same."
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She was seven minutes late.
Does that even count? Well, according to Katlyn Whittenburg's 5-year-old daughter's school it does, and she had to write down a reason. Momma isn't even joking around.
"Seven minutes late? What do you want me to say? What do you want me to say? Because I couldn't? Because I simply cannot?" she asks. "Because my daughter painted a mural using toothpaste this morning, and apparently I support the arts. Because my other daughter had a bloody nose and sneezed, and now I gotta get a crime scene cleanup crew to come."
Girl, we are here for this. Is there really any way to properly articulate the circus that is most homes before school?
Whittenburg says the other parents claim 'bad traffic' is the reason they're late.
She laughs and says she could also say traffic but only because she wanted to jump into it after her daughter tried to put on an "unsanctioned bee costume" instead of a coat. She says she cannot tell her whole life story in a single line because, truth be told, it started way back when.
"I'm just going to write 'See attachment' and start carrying around a file folder of all the reasons I can't and shan't. My shan't folder," she says.
Yep, we are getting one of our own. This woman is brilliant.
So many parents felt her pain.
This TikTok has 1.4 million views. People are obsessed, and a lot have their own reasons that are so darn relatable.
"The amount of times I've simply written 'socks,'" someone wrote.
We love this comment: "I've written 'I'm trash' three times this year."
And so much … this: "I wrote 'unscheduled parenting required.'"
Kids do the craziest stuff.
Sometimes, parents just have to tell the blunt truth.
"More than once I have wrote 'she didn't want to come here,'" one mom shared.
"yes. I once said we could only find one shoe," someone commented. Seriously, how does that kind of stuff always seem to disappear?
Another mom wrote a familiar story: "He ate the wrong lunchable yesterday and he wanted to eat it today so it was a 10 minute ordeal."
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Some parents had jokes.
"My dad used to always write 'snow in the driveway' we lived in Florida. " one comment reads.
"Our school had an iPad with 4 reasons 1 being 'natural disaster' you bet I pushed that every d— time!!!" another person commented.
It's like we could hear "Anti-Hero" playing.
"My daughter's school did that too, finally started putting the most graphic stuff in there … guess what form changed the next year? " another parent wrote.
Kaylyn, thank you for making us feel so much better about ourselves. You are totally onto something. We have to go now; so many things to file in our "shan't folder."
