Once you're pregnant, there's a good chance it'll hit you: Your in-laws aren't just your in-laws anymore, they're your baby's grandparents. Though all in-law relationships are different, thinking about what their behavior might be like after the baby arrives can be a source of stress for you in your pregnancy, but it doesn't have to be that way. In fact, once you've had a baby, there's a good chance that your partner's parents can be a good source of family support — especially if you're able to have some important conversations ahead of time.
Pregnancy and new motherhood are two times in your life when you'll likely need more support and help than ever before, but what if you're already experiencing a lot of family drama? Here's how to get ahead of the new problems that might crop up and repair the old ones before baby makes their arrival.
How to deal with in-laws: Setting boundaries
In-law relationships: setting yourself up for success
Like we said in the beginning, these aren't just your in-laws anymore. These are your child's grandparents, aunts, and uncles. While there's nothing wrong with taking space from toxic relationships, in most cases, you will want to foster healthy relationships between your child and their family — and seeing how much your baby loves them may make you love them more, too.
And if you've had these hard conversations with your in-laws and nothing seems to be getting better, it might be time to cut your losses and find your zen. Arguing with them may not be worth the toll it takes on your mental health, especially while pregnant or postpartum. You might find it's easiest just to ignore their comments and unwanted advice and do your own thing anyway.
"Now when my husband’s cousin visits, I let them spend time together. I don’t feel responsible to entertain someone who insults me, but I can certainly put up with a few days a year of being totally annoyed. Because in the end, annoying relatives are usually visiting for just a few days. it’s not the end of the world. And certainly not worth the fight," mom Meredith Gordon wrote for Mom.com.
Set your boundaries, make them clear, and keep the lines of communication open from here on out. There will certainly be bumps in the road along the way, but hopefully, you'll find that working for a better in-law relationships and having that family support is well worth it.
