20 Ridiculously Petty Reasons Not to Date Someone

Have you ever dumped someone because he or she hated your favorite show? Or had teeth that reminded you of corn kernels? Or even just because the person walked too loudly? If so, you are not alone! According to a recent Reddit thread, there are thousands of people with some super-petty reasons for not dating someone, and if you're not one of these petty people also, then you'll probably laugh (or roll your eyes). 

I have to confess: I thought I was the only one who had ever dumped someone because of a spelling error (true story, he wrote me a love note, but misspelled "sweet" and ended up saying I was "so sweat"). But then, I found my fellow picky people and now I totally feel justified. 

If you think you're petty or picky when it comes to dating, then you need to see what these people have to say. They might even have you beat. If you're more of a go-with-the-flow kind of dater, then you will most likely find these ridiculous. But, we swear, this really happens! 

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Read on for 20 of the most random, ridiculous, and LOL-worthy reasons people have for refusing to date someone. I'm totally cringing for the girl in #14!

What a Waste

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"Went on a date to Buffalo Wild Wings. She ordered 20 wings. She ate maybe seven of them. I was gladly going to pay, but when the bill came, she didn't offer. Nor did she want a doggie bag. Seeing all of that food go to waste was the deal breaker. It wouldn't have bothered me if she said anything about it. But when I asked if she wanted a box, her exact response was 'nah.'"

Gingers Need Not Apply

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"As a redhead, I can't bring myself to date other redheads. I'm constantly worried that people would think we were related."

Text Trouble

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"'cUs sHe TeXteD LiKe dIs! :):):):) :p:p:p:p =))))))"

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Something Fishy

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"I went on a couple of dates with a guy who was so afraid of fish touching his legs that he refused to get in any water other than a chlorinated pool. Probably not a deal breaker for most people, but I'm an aquatic ecologist, and my job at the time (right out of college) was to organize stream cleanup events. I couldn't see myself dating someone who was afraid of fish."

Common Name

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"You could be the man of my dreams, and I'm not going to date you if you have the same name as my dad. Which is actually a dealbreaker more often then you think, since my dad's name is Michael."

Not a Fan

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Me: "Who's your favorite artist?"

Them: "Pitbull!"

Nature Lover

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"On our first date, which was a nice hike, she kept going out of her way to step on bugs she deemed offensive, like spiders and fire ants. I don't like them either, but they're just chilling out on the path, doing normal bug things. You don't need to kill them for no reason."

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Unrealistic

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"When this guy told me he couldn't watch movies that were unrealistic, I instantly said 'nope.' My favorite genres are fantasy and sci-fi, so no thank you."

Cankles

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"If she has cankles. I even truly feel bad about it, but the heart wants what it wants, and it wants dainty ankles."

Blue Plate Special

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"I dated a girl who consistently smelled like pancakes. At first, it was cool, I love pancakes anyways. But after a couple dates, the smell started to get to me. Eventually, I started getting nauseous. So I stopped calling her. Sorry, Jessica.  I still love pancakes though. Took me a while before I could eat them again."

No Filter

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"No Snapchat filters! I dumped a guy for sending me a picture of [a] naked pic of himself … but with the damn dog ears filter. EW!"

Two Issues

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"She used the word 'sassy' to describe herself way too much in one date. And also, she likes horses. I could deal with one or the other, but not both."

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Hipster

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"I set up a date with a Tinder guy who looked hot. Then, he showed up at the date with a hipster mustache. I got up and left. If he thinks ironic facial hair is a good look, what other terrible ideas does he have?"

Number Two

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"In my early 20s, I was a lifeguard. The management company sent me to a different pool one day. It was dead. Only seven or eight people came to the pool the whole day. One of them was a girl around my age. We started chatting and ended up hanging out most of the day. She was pretty cute and had just finished college and moved to the area, was looking for a job.

"So, I made plans to come back and hang out at her apartment that evening. We were drinking some wine, watching a movie, started making out a little bit. I went to use her bathroom and saw an enormous turd that she forgot to flush. I was young and immature, but it was really jarring for me. Anyway, I stuck around hooking up until about 4 a.m., but I totally ghosted on her after. I just kept thinking of that big old deuce she forgot to flush, and I feel kinda terrible about it now that I'm older. She was a very cute girl, very nice body, friendly, smart. Just couldn't get over the fact that she poops."

Turn Off

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"I stopped talking to someone after, on our first date, she said 'Wow, you use your turn signal? Why?' Well, there were a number of red flags, but that was kind of the straw that broke the camel's back."

Regrets

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"She couldn't understand how to play Tetris. I tried to teach her, and she just could not get the concept of the game, and I was so frustrated by it I wrote her off. She later posed for Playboy. I've made many mistakes in my life."

Correlates With Crazy

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"Any Marilyn Monroe artwork in a girl's apartment. After multiple encounters with different girls with this stuff, it's always correlated with crazy."

Keyboard Problem

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"Had a crush on a cute girl in the office a few months back. One day, she submitted a ticket for a keyboard problem. I went over to assist and proceeded to watch her toggle caps lock on and off for every capital letter. Needless to say, I am no longer interested."

Treat Me Right

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"Having only one-ply toilet paper at home. If they can't treat their own asses right, how can I expect them to treat me right?"

No Latte Love

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"He was way too proud of the fact that he didn't drink coffee. Like, dude, you don't win a medal for never having been to Starbucks. That isn't a thing. There is a reason people like coffee. It is delicious and makes things better, asshole."

These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.