Offer to Chauffeur
Organize a Visitor Schedule
Support works best when it's done in groups, so get your family and friends together to help out. Organize a prayer chain, visitor chain or calling chain so your friend knows she's in others' thoughts and never feels out of touch.
Prepare Meals
It may become harder for your friend to tackle daily meals—and you can help in a couple of ways. Get a group of friends together to make and bring over hot dinners, rotating so it's less of a burden on each of you. Also, if your friend still wants to cook and bake, you can help her set up a meal-planning service to take the extra thought out of shopping, prepping and making meals.
Create a Calendar
Create a calendar for your loved one, so she knows when doctor appointments are, when visitors plan to drop by or when someone plans on helping out with a meal. Personalize it by adding fun pictures of your friend.
Listen and Let Her Vent
After a friend is diagnosed with cancer, avoid saying things like, "Don't worry, you'll be OK" or "I know how you feel." (Check out Cancer.net's list of taboo phrases.) Instead, simply listen. If she has fears, worries, concerns or needs, let her share them with you. Say you're happy to be her ear to vent and will only attempt to give advice if she wants it. And more than anything, talk about regular things. She is still the same person, so make sure to treat her like it.
Get Her Out of the House
There are some days when your friend won't even have the energy to walk to the bathroom, and that's OK. Let her rest, help her when you can and just be there for her. However, there are going to be days when she's feeling better and more like herself. Take those days and make the most of them. Go for ice cream or take a walk in the park. There are small excursions waiting just out the door, and it's your job to make them happen.
Be a Note Taker
Go with her to as many appointments as you can, and take notes. It's a lot of information and medical jargon that many of us need to sift through later. Allow her to listen, and you be her hands to write down everything that's being said. That way, you can review it together later and ask any follow-up questions that arise.
