Each couple makes child care decisions based on what works best for them. When couples choose to have one parent stay home while the other works, it comes with some expectations. And if the stay-at-home parent isn’t living up to those expectations, it can be hard. One mom says she can no longer trust her husband when he’s at home taking care of their baby.
A neighbor recently revealed to her that her husband goes out jogging in their neighborhood without the baby. And, she found out that it’s been going on for quite a while.
She needed a space to sort out her feelings.
The mom posted in the r/Mommit forum on Reddit. she later deleted her rant, but not before others found the post.
“I feel completely sick,” she said. “I just found out that when my husband watches our baby while I’m at work, he will leave my not even 15-month baby home alone to go on runs.” He tried to rationalize his behavior, saying that he stays within a quarter mile of their home. He further tried to plead his case by saying that he goes while their 15-month-old son naps.
Her husband knew she’d be upset and chose not to tell her about his runs.
“I found out from someone else telling me he does this,” the mom shared. “He claims the reason he never told me is because he knew I wouldn’t be happy about that and he’s been doing this for MONTHS behind my back.”
Understandably, the woman is feeling majorly betrayed by the person she’s supposed to trust the most. If he’s lying about something like this, what else could he be keeping from her because he knows it would upset her?
To make matters worse, she’s pregnant with their second child.
The soon-to-be mom of two is struggling with how to handle this revelation. She’s unsure if she will be able to trust him now that she knows. “No matter how many times he reassured [me] something like this won’t ever happen again … I just keep thinking that he would’ve continued this until something happened,” she shared.
She then went through a list of possible nightmare scenarios that could have put their child’s life in danger. Things like a fire or gas leak came to mind. She also fears her son could learn how to climb out of his crib and get hurt. “Or he simply could wake up crying and be scared because nobody is there responding,” she added.
There’s no reason for her husband to leave the house.
In her post, the woman revealed that they have exercise equipment, including a treadmill, in their home. On top of that, they have a jogging stroller.
She admitted that they don’t have a baby monitor with Wi-Fi or any kind of home camera setup that would allow her husband to check on the baby while he’s out. But she did suggest getting them to keep tabs on the child. The woman says that she doesn’t want to do something like go to the police, but she can’t trust her husband to properly care for their children anymore.
“He CANNOT leave the house unless he takes the baby with him,” she said firmly.
People overwhelmingly agreed with her.
“I’m so sorry you’re going through this, it is totally unacceptable,” one person wrote. “How does he not know if the baby has woken while he’s gone and needs some comfort? I’m completely mind boggled you had to have this conversation. I really feel for you OP. I really hope he listens to your very legitimate concerns and won’t do it again.”
“Get a Ring doorbell and have it notify you every time the door opens,” another person suggested. “Let him know you’re doing this and that the first time he leaves without the baby, you will immediately be calling the cops. If it’s not that big of a deal, then the cops won’t do anything, right?”
A different commenter was a little more brutally honest. “There was never a good excuse but the fact that you have a jogging stroller and a treadmill makes this almost sinister,” they said. “Is he trying to endanger the baby?? I’m afraid this would be a deal breaker for me.”
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
