For as long as human beings have been having sex, they've been inventing funny ways to describe it. Why? Because sometimes you need to refer to your favorite activity in front of your kids! Here's a hot stack of euphemisms we hope you'll find useful in the near future.
1. Make whoopie
2. Facemaking
3. Horizontal refreshment
4. Oscillate the unmentionables
5. Horizontal hokey pokey
6. Monster mash
7. Do the no-pants dance
8. Thread the needle
9. Test the mattress
10. Mingle limbs
11. Roll in the hay
12. Hot yoga
13. Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo
14. Butter the biscuit
15. Dissapoint the wife
16. Make the beast with two backs
17. Take a trip to pound town
18. Amorous congress
19. Bake the potato
20. Two-person pushup
21. Check the oil
22. Frolic in the cornfield
23. Knock boots
24. Pogo in the shrub
25. The old in out, in out
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26. Spelunk the bat cave
27. Sweep the chimney
28. Shock the monkey
29. Waka-waka
30. Rumpy-pumpy
31. Take Grandma to Applebee's
32. Hit a home run
33. Adult naptime
34. Tactical insertion
35. Carnal embrace
36. Yiff
37. Ride the bony express
38. Assault with a friendly weapon
39. Boink
40. Spear the rabbit
41. Snu-snu
42. Vulcanize the whoopee stick
43. Open the gates of Mordor
44. Tie the true lover's knot
45. Get a bit of the other
46. Pray with knees upwards
47. Roger
48. Make a hole in the welcome mat
49. Box the clown
50. Put email in the spam folder
51. Put ranch in her Hidden Valley
52. Hanky panky
53. Slytherin her Hufflepuff
54. Park the Plymouth in the garage of love
55. Play in the box our kids came in
56. Make love
What's your favorite euphemism for sex?
Image via KonstantinChristian/Shutterstock
