Her name wasn't Jane, but I'll call her that. For almost three years, Jane was the worst part of most of my days. She was an exasperating combination of lazy and know-it-all, and the times when I had to interact with her were the times when my job felt the most like WORK.
One of the hard realities of adult life is that although you can choose your job, you can't choose your coworkers. Sometimes you luck out and get colleagues who become friends. Other times, you end up sharing cubicle space with someone who becomes known as the "dental floss bandit" (true story! See story #5 and cringe).
Read on for stories of coworkers so annoying that all you'll want to call HR yourself.
Image via iStock.com/laflor
Typing Problems
"I had a coworker who complained daily that I 'typed too loudly.' Went as far as having my keyboard swapped when I wasn't there. Please note that typing is rather critical to doing one's job when one works at a newspaper." — Lizzie B.
Special Snowflake
"We hired a gal right out of college for an entry-level position. Instead of being humble and trying to learn the ropes, she came in guns blazing. She asked for a raise after her first month and she drove our admins crazy by always telling them that they needed to 'catch up' to whatever the newest technology was. She might have had good ideas but she totally lacked experience to back them up. She acted like she'd grown up being told she was perfect and special every day. Drove us all bonkers." — Mellisa T.
TMI
"A coworker in next office is hard of hearing, so he talks very loudly on the phone. I got to hear a conversation with his doctor about his 'intimacy' issues." — Name withheld
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Evil Genius
"Former coworker vanished several hours a day; sometimes started WebEx meetings with just HERSELF so her status looked busy. This might seem genius unless you sit right next to your coworkers and leave your laptop (with empty WebEx) at your desk. She was an evil genius." — Stephanie S.
The Bandit
"We called him the 'dental floss bandit.' He used to walk around and floss and when he was done he'd just drop the floss and go back to work." — Erin S.
Mansplainer
"I once had one who would patiently explain things like 'point and click' to me in front of our bosses" — Kate W.
Email Annoyance
"I have a coworker who is very nice and well-meaning but she has this one habit that drives me completely crazy: She puts read receipts on EVERY email. So every time I get an email from her, even if it's just a quick thing or a funny joke, I get the pop up box requesting that I send the receipt. It is just so annoying and presumptuous. Your emails aren't THAT important!" — Carla W.
Mr. Untouchable
"I don't know what the deal is but there is this guy here who is totally untouchable. He gets away with murder. He doesn't even wear shoes in our semi-formal office. He is a slacker and a drag on the team, but he never gets in trouble. I'm convinced he has naked pictures of our boss or something." — Name withheld
Checked Out
"Bob is kind and nice and beloved in our office. He is also retiring in six months, so he is so checked out. He is barely here most days and when he is in, he just spends the day visiting with friends in other departments or watching golf videos online. This is bad because he is our CFO. That's kind of important work, right?" — Polly N.
The Pooper
"I feel so bad saying this, but I had a coworker who had a lot of health issues. One of his issues was that he couldn't always control his bowels. So he pretty regularly shat his pants at work. This combined with the fact that he didn't shower on a daily basis made it so hard to have a cubicle next to him." — Name withheld
Sick Again?
"My coworker is the biggest hypochondriac ever. We have a pretty generous sick-time policy and she totally abuses it. If someone in the office sneezes, you know she'll be out sick the next day. If she really is sick, she needs to go to the doctor. Nobody should have a sick day every week!" — Tya S.
Chatty Cathy
"She means well, but the older lady in my office NEVER STOPS TALKING. She could talk the paint of the wall. She only talks about herself too: all the ways she's been wronged, all her health issues, all the things her grandkids are doing, and so on and so on. What makes me the most frustrated is that she has turned me into a bad listener. Nobody could listen to someone talk as much as she does without mentally checking out." — Grace R.
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