I love my husband unconditionally. I know he is smart, sweet, and sexy. We've been married for over a decade and I'm certain he's the right guy for me. In being with someone for that long, you learn so much about who they are, so, obviously, there's nothing I'd want to change about him, right? Well … Of course, I don't want to change who he is as person. He's great. I just want to change this one small thing: the way he eats chicken.
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I don't want to go into graphic detail, but there is this sound he makes when he chews and I just can't stand it. It is the actual worst. I want to be married to him for the rest of my life. I also want to ban chicken from our household.
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I was griping about this online and it turns out that basically all my friends have at least one thing that they'd change about their partners, if they could.
I promised not to share their full names and they agreed to let me share the irritations, big and small, that drive them the most crazy when it comes to married life. Click on for a peek into what real marriages are really like.
Tightwad
"I wish he could loosen up when it comes to money. He budgets down to the last red cent. Stop guilt-ing me about every cup of coffee. We can afford my daily latte habit, tightwad." — B.R.
Wake Up!
"I wish he was doing something productive instead of sleeping on the couch right now! C'mon, man, wake up and do something with the kids or clean or SOMETHING." — A.H.
Nature Man
"He is obsessed with the outdoors. Which is fine, but I'm an indoorsy kind of gal. I don't want to hike. He is always trying to talk me into something involving nature. Hard pass." — C.K.
Pick Up Man
"He is such a damn slob. I hate seeing his messy desk but it is the one spot I refuse to pick up. I feel like I live with the adult version of Pig-Pen." — G.F.
Get Connected
"I wish he seemed to miss our life before kids. I feel like we just aren't connected as much these days and I miss it. But I'm not sure he does. Show me that you want to get connected." — W.E.
Handy Man
"I wish he were handier. He can't even pound a nail straight. I wish we didn't have to hire out every single house job." — A.B.
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Book Smarts
"I wish he was more intellectual. He has dyslexia, which really hurt his confidence in being able to do well in school, so he never got farther than one semester of college. Even though he's smart in a lot of ways, he has trouble thinking critically about things, and I think it's because he never reads very much." — E.B.
So Zen
"This is SUPER petty, but sometimes it annoys me how zen my husband is. He does yoga and meditates daily and is always so calm. Sometimes I just want him to get worked up about something. Anything!" — R.T.
Take a Day
"My husband is a total workaholic. He works at least 60 hours a week and travels several weeks a year. I'm proud of him and how much he has accomplished but I feel like a damn single mother half the time." — M.H.
Just Talk to Me
"When I critique him on something or try and discuss his family (the only thing we argue about lately), he gets very defensive and angry. I wish we could just TALK through difficult things and not always escalate it to an argument." — L.C.
Puppy Love
"If I could change anything, I would make him want to have a dog. I really, really, really want a dog and he totally refuses. What kind of maniac doesn't love dogs?" — G.D.
CrossFit Dude
"I wish my husband cared about anything as much as he cares about doing CrossFit. He's in great shape and I dig the muscles, but he is a whiny baby if he misses a single workout." — P.K.
Get a Social Life
"My husband is an introvert and I'm a big extrovert. I feel like I always have to drag him to social events, even though he usually enjoys them. I'd really like him to want to have more fun." — D.E.
Buy a Clue
"I wish my husband, who has a freaking PhD, was capable of going to the grocery store without having to call me 12 times to be reminded of what kind of food we eat every single day. Seriously, how hard is it to remember to get strawberry jam?" — R.S.
Say Something
"Superficially: I wish he was taller. Deeper? I want him to communicate and work things out instead of going silent until the moment passes." — C.M.
Fight Me
"I wish he would fight more. Sounds weird, right? Sometimes I just want to argue and he doesn't respond. He's pretty chill but could be more passionate about things besides work and Halloween. He really loves Halloween." — E.L.
Needs Friends
"I wish he was less codependent. It's sweet that he always wants to be with me, but I wish that he also had his own friends to hang out with. He doesn't have much of a social life." — C.S.
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