"Perfect" is a tough goal — because the reality is that no one is perfect, we all have our things that make us unique. But there is perfect to be found within love; it's a feeling that can make a relationship feel precisely right and checks all those feel-good boxes on our personal lists. We spoke to 15 women who have a bit of experience with what a great relationship feels like, and there is a lot to glean from their responses.
We can talk about harmony and compatibility. We can talk about mutual respect and admiration. But sometimes it's in the little things, the actions people take and ways of being that truly show what love means. Love is and should be in all the details … even the tiny ones.
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That's a theme within these responses — those little things are all part of the big picture, part of the definition of what makes a perfect relationship. It's all about feelings, not only toward the other person, but toward oneself — the feelings that are brought out within oneself. These responses can serve as a guide to take a look at a current relationship and evaluate. They can also inspire and bring forward realizations of ways to a deeper love.
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Love is beautiful … but not without challenges. It's always a work in progress and these women certainly share some insight on what makes a perfect relationship.
Feelings.
"There's a feeling of comfort and respect and excitement all in one — that's what a perfect relationship feels like." – Carin D.
Good together and apart.
"The perfect relationship is when we both feel awesome when we're together and when we're doing our own things, too." – Sheri R.
Feeling heard.
"One element to a perfect relationship is when I feel heard, that my partner really listens to what I say and takes it in and understands me. This is also reciprocal." – Jenn S.
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Staying true.
"The perfect relationship is when I don't change anything about myself to be with someone." – Elizabeth H.G.
No judgment.
"The perfect relationship is knowing you can be 100 percent yourself without judgement." – Theresa F.
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Honoring needed breaks.
"The perfect relationship is … taking up the slack around the house, with the kids etc., when the other person is tired or just needs a break." – Jenny B.
Good communication.
"The perfect relationship is good communication and knowing when to bite your tongue!" – Nicole F.W.
Passion.
"The perfect relationship is one where you feel passion with each other — not just with sex, but when supporting each other's hopes and dreams and even everyday stuff." – Melanie N.
A true partner.
"When you truly feel like you have a lover, a best friend, and a true partner — that's what the perfect relationship feels like." – Emily H.
Acceptance.
"The perfect relationship is one where both partners feel totally loved and accepted for who they really are as people." – Jacqueline B.C.
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Choice.
"The perfect relationship is making a conscious choice to add that person to your life rather needing them to make you feel whole. " – Ashley A.
True selves.
"The perfect relationship is where you both see one another as your true selves, and accept and love one another for it." – Marla F.
Quiet.
"The perfect relationship is when you both know when to shut the hell up." – Rebecca Z.
Shared dreams.
"The perfect relationship is one where you continually value the other person, enjoy each other's company, and share similar hopes and dreams for the future." – Jenny E.
Just be.
"One quality to a perfect relationship is when you can just be with each other — no phones, no TV, sometimes even no talking. When you are able to just be with someone and feel the love and comfort, that's something really special." – Dana O.
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