We sadly don't always get lucky when it comes to blended families. There are true horror stories to simply incidents where members of the family don't bond and, therefore, don't have a particularly close relationship. When one groom who never had a chance to really connect with his family growing up decided not to extend an invite to them for his wedding, he didn't think much of it.
His mother, however, had different feelings.
The groom sent his mother an invitation with an unaddressed "plus one" for her to take, and he totally left out his stepsiblings. He explained here:
Shortly after his mother remarried and it added to a bit of chaos in their house, he split.
"I personally got lucky in my eyes as I went to live with my dad 3 months later in order to go to college, my dad lived 10 minutes away from my college, hence the choice," he wrote. "But as a direct result of this I never got close to my step-siblings or stepfather, I was always friendly to them when I visited and all but I came to visit to spend time with my mom and my siblings."
He said seven years later, he and his girlfriend of six years have decided to finally tie the knot, and his mother and bio sisters were ecstatic.
After a few months of planning, they decided to finally start sending out invitations for their wedding for next year.
"This is where all hell broke loose," he said. "Apparently my step-siblings are crushed that I did not invite them and my stepfather is angry he did not get an invitation of his own or was included on my moms invitation, meanwhile my mom is angry about that but also about the fact I did not invite my stepdads brothers and nieces."
Truthfully, he is at a loss as to why everyone is so upset.
"I feel bad after it though, I honestly did not expect my step-siblings to even want to come let alone be crushed about not coming, but on the other side of it, we're only inviting about 60 people (location wedding) and we needed every spot for people we're actually close too."
So now he wants to know if he was totally wrong for not inviting them, or if he is in the clear.
Honestly, people are a little torn over it.
"It's your wedding and headcount is expensive," empathized one user. "If it becomes a thing, hold a casual reception with the folks who feel left out."
People were less "offended" over his stepsiblings and more on the fence about the whole "plus one" move with his mother.
"Seven years later — yeah that was really rude," one person bluntly told him. "I don’t like my step-dad but that is a slap in the face to not name the step parent on behalf of your mom. I would be offended if someone didn’t put my partner's name in the card since we’ve been together for so long but you chose not to put a married person's spouse on the card. You put her in an awkward situation. I don’t think you need to invite his outside family but if you share holidays with his children then it should be more considered."
The groom maintained he did it that way to make sure his stepfather didn't feel obligated, given that they weren't close.
All in all, people felt sorry for his mom.
Although the stepdad and the groom may not be close, they didn't have an actively negative relationship, and the groom should have thought of how it would make his mother feel to receive an invitation like that.
