Being a first-generation immigrant daughter is a unique and rewarding experience, but it comes with its own set of challenges and sometimes can feel burdensome. From breaking new ground in a new country to balancing two cultures, the journey is both enriching and demanding.
I faced a lot of “firsts” that were expected of me. I had to be the trailblazer for my family, paving the way for future generations. I had to push the first-generation boulder up the mountain in four feet of metaphorical snow just to pave the way for the rest of my family. The hardest part about being the first is that there is no one to show you the way or even guide you in the right direction. There was no roadmap and no one to blame for the challenges I encountered.
I had to work tirelessly and fight harder to get where I needed to go in life. And just because they didn’t know how to help me get there didn’t mean they didn’t expect me to go. If you know, you know.
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First to Attend College
I was the first in my family to attend college and graduate school. No one before me had filled out a college application or taken the SATs. Concepts like the FAFSA were foreign to my family. Moreover, we didn't have the financial means to send me to college.
Surprisingly, I was accepted into every college I applied to. Just weeks before leaving for college, however, my father casually mentioned that he would see me next summer. It was a bombshell – he expected me to disappear for an entire school year. I decided to defer college and worked in a law firm during my "gap year."
The pressure to excel was always there, but the responsibility rested solely on my shoulders. They wanted a better future for me; they just didn't know how to make it happen. I had to figure it out on my own.
The First to 'Belong'
One of the most significant accomplishments is the ability to walk into a room in the United States and feel a sense of belonging, but it comes with a caveat. We are instilled with deep patriotism from birth, taught to appreciate the opportunities this country offers. Yet the color of our skin often precedes us, and we constantly have to prove we deserve to be here.
That has always been particularly hard for me to watch my dad (a proud man) struggle with his place in this country. I have the privilege of being born here so we don’t have the same experience, but his struggle is still my struggle.
I remember a time when my father suggested that we take our mother's last name, thinking it would make life easier with an Anglo last name rather than a Spanish one. I couldn't imagine not being proud of my Latino culture, and I felt like changing my name was hiding who I really was.
Initially, I was hurt by the suggestion, but as I encountered racism myself, I realized the sacrifice he had made to provide us with a better life. Unfortunately, it wouldn't shield us entirely. In a world where being different is seen as a threat by the majority, racism always finds a way.
The First Grandchild Born in the United States
Being born in a country that treated my father like an outsider, judging him by his skin color and accent, made it difficult for me to take pride in my birthplace. Raised between two cultures and countries, I struggle to feel like I truly belong to either. Having the best of both worlds should be a privilege, but when the majority rejects your minority heritage, it leaves a lasting mark.
Throughout my life, I watched my father work tirelessly to support our family. He loves America and did his best to make the most of his modest beginnings, working long hours on swing shifts. Leaving his family and home in Mexico behind, he sought a better life for us. He started from the bottom and never complained about the hardships.
Just as he never complained about hard work, I embraced the idea that where there's a will, there's a way. My legacy in this life is knowing that where there is a will, there is always a way. My immigrant father taught me that.
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The First but Not the Last
Now, many years and college degrees later, I'm a mom who, like my father, wants more and better for her Latina daughters. The difference is that I've learned how to achieve it. I understand that it takes hard work and resilience because, honestly, it's not much easier now for Latinos than it was 30 years ago. The key difference is that I was born here, and I belong here. I'm entitled to the same rights as anyone else born in this country, and no one can change that.
I ensure that my daughters are proud of their Latino heritage, aware of the sacrifices made by those who came before them, and empowered to hold their heads high. They receive the love and support that comes from the struggles we've endured to be here. Being a first-generation immigrant daughter is not a burden but an absolute privilege and honor. It's a chance to pave the way for future generations of Latinos.
Are you a first-generation immigrant, or do you relate to this experience in any way? Share your story in the comments and let's continue inspiring and supporting each other on this incredible journey of resilience and success! Together, we can overcome any challenge and build a brighter future for the generations to come.
