Money is one of those things that can really make or break a couple. If one person is super spendy and the other is extremely frugal — well, you can imagine that things sometimes get tense. According to one man on Reddit, it’s his wife who just won’t put down the credit card, but when he finally asked her to sit down and budget, she was totally insulted.
The young couple got married in March, and according to the Original Poster, “for her, it's been a spending spree ever since.”
It’s been “hundreds at a time on clothes, accessories, makeup and all others that fall within that ilk, little trinkets for interior design, just spending all of the time,” he explained in his post on Reddit's AITA forum.
The OP makes an “okay living” but the two are only staying afloat “because I don't buy anything.”
The 25-year-old finally had it when his wife came home wearing a $550 coat.
So he decided to turn to Excel. He made a spreadsheet, explained their budget to her, “and wanted to handle things like adults.”
His wife? Not as exactly thrilled about her hubby’s plan.
“She acted like she was nodding off, struggling to stay away, she looked like a high school kid stuck in the most boring class in the school,” he recalled.
The OP never thought the heart-to-heart would result in a fight — ”I thought it was fair.”
“She, on the other hand, doesn't view this as a budget that benefits us both, she views this as I'm dominating her and I'm constricting her,” he explained before asking if he was being an asshole.
Many commenters agreed. His wife needed to learn how to pinch her pennies.
“[Not the A–hole] $550 on a coat! Who is she kidding?" wondered one person. "Sounds like she might be a little depressed and shopping to fill a hole."
"NTA, but are you sure you’re her husband and not her wallet?" another commenter asked.
"I really think the two of you could use some couple’s counseling," a third person commented. "I wish you the best!"
Other people thought they both were at fault.
"[Everyone Sucks Here] but I'm particularly upset you said you just assumed you and your wife would be on the same page," one commenter wrote.
"[Everyone Sucks Here], I'd say N T A but theres no way you didn't know she was this extremely immature before getting married, and stuff like a basic budget should have been discussed before moving in together, not to mention before getting married," someone else agreed.
"You're both young and it's quite possible you are not on the same foot about finances which is a deal breaker," another commenter wrote before adding this:
"However, you do not 'put' your wife on budget as if she were a child. You don't build the spreadsheet first and then tell her what she can spend. You two together take a look at finances together, what's coming in, what you can afford, what your goals are. You also have discussions about the 'yours' 'mine' and 'ours' pots of money."
These two need to come to an agreement about their finances ASAP, because as we all know, things become even even more expensive if you have kids.
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