All kinds of things can happen when you're delivering a baby. We know that women hear crazy things when they're in labor. But what about the hospital staff? We got a couple of labor nurses to tell their wildest delivery stories. You may be shocked by what they shared, but you'll definitely gain some appreciation for what L&D nurses go through to help us bring our children into the world.
Gimmie My Drugs & My Baby Daddy
One mom told us "All I need is my morphine and my baby daddy!" Which can be summed up with one word: Poppy.
Bag O' Amniotic Fluid
An ER doctor brought a zip lock bag filled with his patient's amniotic fluid to show the staff. Why???
The Silent Labor, Thwarted
One husband posted a sign on the door requesting silence in the delivery room. Every time anyone came in, he'd use the "keep it down" hand gesture. Too bad they were stuck with the loudest nurse on the floor.
Your Baby Is Ugly
One husband told his wife right after delivery, "the baby is kinda ugly" — and followed that up with "the baby looks like you."
Dad Turns Into Magic Mike
One distracted dad changed out of his clothes and put on an OR jumpsuit. It was see-through. You're supposed to put them on over your clothes…
When You Gotta Go Part I
A woman in triage couldn't be bothered to walk the 5 feet to the bathroom (or maybe she didn't know where it was?), so she squatted right there next to the stretcher and peed on the floor.
When You Gotta Go Part II
A woman in the recovery room started screaming, "I have to take a sh*t!" And then, she bent over and took one, right there on the floor.
Plenty of Room for a Grand Entrance
A doctor expressed concern to his patient that the baby might be too big for a vaginal deliver. When he left, the husband told his wife, "The baby might be too big — did you tell him that you have a big vagina?"
In Way Too Deep
During an exam a doctor told his patient, "I'm deeper in you than your husband has ever been … " Ewww.
TMI Pain Relief
A patient laboring without medication used masturbation to manage her pain — with her mother, husband, doula, and nurses in the room with her. By the way, there was more than one story like this…
Double the Fun for One Father
One proud father showed up for the delivery of two different babies by two different women within the same 36 hours.
Squeeze This Not That
"When I was in labor with my second daughter my husband asked if I wanted to squeeze his hand during the contractions. I said I was going to squeeze something else, and he said that is more action than he thought he would get in the next 6 weeks. We all laughed and 2 minutes later my water broke all over the floor."
