Sometimes when you have a friend or family member who announces their pregnancy, you have to be all sappy and send them a heartfelt note of congratulations that makes flowery references to this special journey/miraculous time in their life. Then there are your awesome friends, to whom you can say things like, "Dude, congrats! Also, welcome to eight months of living in Fartville, Population: You."
For your pregnant pals who don't mind a little sarcasm along with their heartburn, here are 10 congratulatory cards that are more what I'd call "real talk" than Hallmark. After all, pregnancy is an amazing gift … one that's frankly best enjoyed if you can laugh at the less-than-perfect moments.
Welcome to motherhood
The card, it speaks the truth.
Try not to think about it
Nope, this entirely true fact isn't weird at all. It's beautiful and miraculous. It's … ACK.
Yay for no periods! Oh wait ...
Well, at least she won't have to buy tampons for a few months.
For the mom-to-be who hasn't settled on a name
Inside message: "Maybe you should wait to consider baby names, until after your hormones return to normal. (Congratulations on your pregnancy.)" Ha!
For the coworker with a REALLY good sense of humor
I don't recommend sending this one to, say, your boss.
So, you're pregnant?
Either she laughs so hard at this she pees her pants (for the 15th time this week) or … well, let's just hope that's her reaction.
Perspective is everything
You can be a Kardashian or you can turn your vagina into a Pez dispenser. Options!
The mixed emotions card
Here's what the inside says: "Congratulations! I hope this card doesn't offend you, I just thought you should get used to shit, since you'll be handling a lot of it soon."
What we're all really thinking
This is the unspoken thought in my head every single time I hear someone's expecting.
Well?
… do you?
