After carrying a baby for what felt like an eternity, all a mom wants to do is enjoy her little one and the fruits of her ahem labor. She took the time to decorate the nursery, buy the tiny clothes, baby-proof the kitchen, and read many, many, baby name lists to prepare. Of all the decisions a mom has to make, choosing a name has to be in the top five most challenging to wrestle. After poring over those lists and finally making a decision, moms finally feel a little ownership over this new and exciting time in their lives. And of course, they want to share their revelation with the ones they love. Too bad someone — who seems like a friend or family member — can sometimes do the unthinkable and ruin that decision entirely. What could they have done, pray tell? That person has used the same baby name before the excited mom could. HOLD UP, what?
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In the words of Full House's Stephanie Tanner, "How rude!"
No, seriously, that's pretty damn rude — especially if a new mama proudly showed off that name, had it on full display at the baby shower (hey, those letter balloons add up), and spent endless hours customizing her son's or daughter's nursery. Or, what about if a mom was holding on to a name, and someone who give birth before her beats her to it? Not cool, other mom!
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While this doesn't exactly justify World War III, it has been known to cause a rift in relationships. See how these moms dealt with being a victim of baby name theft. They might just help others to process the many stages of baby-name theft grief.
Betrayal
"My so-called 'friend' has stolen so much from me that my baby's name was THE last straw. Wedding colors, OK. Use the same decorator, fine. But take my baby name? Sorry, good-bye!" — Rachel T., Seattle, Washington
Shock
"The person who took my baby name saw me research ideas for months. She was pregnant too at the time. I guess I never thought she would take the name I liked when she gave birth before me. I was wrong …" — Aimee S., Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Happiness
"You know, I try to look at the bright side of things. Yeah, it sucked when I found out a person I knew 'took' my baby name, but it's not the end of the world. If she's really happy with it, why not?" — Beverly, Columbia, Missouri
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Disapointment
"My mom and her best friend were big fans of the show Golden Girls when I was growing up. So much that my first teddy bear was named Sophia. I toyed with the name Sophia Wray (husband's middle name) but couldn't bring myself to do it. When my cousin announced her pregnancy about a month later, I was livid because her 'chosen name' was Sofia Rae. I adamantly complained that she had stolen my name especially given the middle name she chose!" — Laura S., Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Sadness
"So … I can't lie to you. I ended a long friendship because a good girlfriend of mine stole my baby name. Judge me all you want, but she was a repeat offender in the theft department (you name it, she took it)." — Tony E., Pensacola, Florida
Rage
"I may have possibly thrown my pregnancy journal at the back of my friend's head when I found out she told someone my baby name idea — and she used it. This is anonymous, right?" — Pam L., San Diego, California
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Calm ... Just Kidding
"I was so hurt when my relative took the name I wanted to use. It was a baby name I loved for many years, and said family member decided because she had children first it was OK to take." — Carolyn G., Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Hurt
"After suffering two miscarriages, my friend helped me through the most difficult time of my life. Still, to this day, I can't figure out why she decided to use the baby name I so desperately wanted to give my child one day. It was beyond hurtful, and our relationship has never recovered." — Joyce W., Grand Rapids, Michigan
Amusement
"I always heard you should watch how much you tell others about your business. So when I finally chose my child's name, I kept telling people around me a lie, in case they wanted to steal it. Someone actually did — so it all worked out." — Casey, Richmond, Virginia
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Regret
"I know, it's stupid to let something like a baby name ruin a relationship. But when you're close to that person — and they know how much meaning it has in your life — and then she takes the name, it's like a betrayal. Yeah, there are plenty of little boys named Alexander. But I'm not going to name my kid after my friend's child. I never should've said anything …" — Jordan T., Columbia, Maryland
Patience
"I told my three girlfriends (when I was like 10, mind you) that, when I grew up, I wanted to name my son Taj. And for 20-some years, all they heard me talk about was that name. So when I my friend Amy gets pregnant before all of us, guess what name she decides to use? Taj. God really tested my patience when I found out. I'm still a work in progress …" — Beatrice, Salt Lake City, Utah
Surprise
"I've been friends with this girl for 20 years. She knew how much I loved the name Abigail. Never in a million years would I have thought that she would too — and take my name! This totally messes with 'girl code.'" — Michelle K., Miami, Florida
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Amazement
"One thing I learned about this experience is how much you sometimes don't know people like you think. My so-called bestie really amazed me by stealing not one, but three baby names. So, because she gets married and has kids before me it's OK? Please." — Yariela T., Raleigh, North Carolina
Being a Tad Insane
"At least my friend had the balls to tell me she was planning to steal my baby name. Too bad she didn't rethink her surroundings. Oh yeah, me and my pregnant self went off — and I gave zero f*cks about it. Who does such a thing? B*tch." — Laurel, Denver, Colorado
Confusion
"I can laugh at it now, but when I was pregnant, my cousin told me she was talking to one of our friends, who told her she was thinking about using the baby name I chose. I thought it was all a joke until I attended her baby shower (it was a couple months before mine). Yeah, she totally announced her baby's name — which was mine! I was like, 'WTF just happened?'" — Christina W., Atlanta, Georgia
Revenge
"She took my baby name; I took her ex-boyfriend. We're getting married next fall. #Problemsolved." — Rebecca, Washington, DC
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Disgust
"Thinking about this kinda brings me back in my feelings. I really, really try not to be a petty person … but this did p*ss me off. I didn't use a baby name book and was just so frustrated that someone, who I considered a sister, would have the audacity to take my name. That's so f-ed up!" — Meagan, San Francisco, California
Emotional
"There were tears, yelling, and a little screaming. OK, I might've thrown something in my closet, but to be honest, I got over it. It's OK to get in your feelings and be a little emotional over the loss of a baby name. It's not OK to sulk and act like you actually lost something, like a baby." — Heather, New York City
Pity
"Who the heck has time to be in their feelings about a name? Yes, I was a victim of baby name theft (or whatever you call it), but I'm still alive. The friend who did it to me is still my girl. Instead of writing her off, I just pitied her decision. But hey, if it happens to you, just consider yourself fabulous — like Beyonce." — Carmen A., Edgewater, New Jersey
Absolutely Nothing
"Seriously, no one died. It was just a name. I never had the copyright to it." — April T., Hackensack, New Jersey
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