Your name is a pretty personal thing — no matter who you are. It's part of what defines you, makes you an individual, and shapes your sense of identity. That's why most parents try, however they can, to give their children unique names that set them apart from the rest. But imagine the surprise one couple had when they learned that their 17-year-old son shares his name with — of all people — a well-known porn star. Yep. And now they're freaking out.
One of the parents recently wrote in to Slate's "Care and Feeding" advice column, wondering if they should permanently change the son's name.
In the letter, the concerned parent explains that aside from the "adult entertainer," their son's name is actually unique. About two years ago, however, the letter writer made the connection between their son and the porn star, "and the problem has only gotten worse, as the star has become more … prolific."
Yikes.
"Any search of the name yields only pages and pages of the star’s porn links," the parent continued. "There’s no shortened form or nickname, and our son has no middle name, so we don’t have options but to legally change it."
To their son's credit, he doesn't seem to care.
"It’s the only name he and everyone else has ever known him by, and a change will likely highlight the underlying reason," the letter writer explained.
The parents worry that the connection will follow their son as he starts to apply to schools and, eventually, when he applies to jobs.
"Rather disturbingly, a very cursory review of appearances might compound this: The adult performer is fairly young and shares race and hair color with our son," the parent added. "Should we play the parent card and force a legal name change? We would allow him to go by the former name with friends and family."
In the comments, almost everyone agreed that this was NBD.
"Up to the son to decide and probably a good idea to be be prepared to tell prospective employers they might get some interesting search results and why," one commenter wrote.
"I don't understand the mother's concern," a second commenter added. "Who really thinks the junior accountant they're hiring for the CPA firm was once a porn star?"
A third person had this to say:
"Your son will have to submit to a comprehensive background check for any job that carries 'responsibility.' That goes double for any job that requires a security clearance. He will also have to fill out a statement of personal history, which will reveal that he only shares the porn star's name. If he lies about anything on the questionnaire, he won't be considered for the job. Prospective employers may get a chuckle out of it, though. That is much more of a concern. Now stop worrying."
Columnist Nicole Cliffe agreed -- if their son doesn't care, Mom and Dad need to chill out.
In her response to the parent, Cliffe called the reaction "ridiculous."
"This is not a problem if your son doesn’t care," she wrote.
"Porn stars do not have, for the most part, the longest of careers, and this is not going to ruin your son’s life," she continued. "When future employers Google him, which is now pretty standard, he can calmly and wryly say, 'There is an adult performer who shares my name, which unfortunately makes me very difficult to accurately Google.'"
Done and done.
