Even in picture-perfect homes, in-laws can still be a sore subject. Even with the best of intentions, there are often times they step on toes or insult their child's new life partners … and then there are ones who totally take it too far.
A young mom recently shared the story of her boyfriend's parents, who when watching her daughter, conducted a paternity test to confirm their son was indeed the father. Now the new mom says she wants them totally out of their lives, but wonders if she's being too extreme.
The new mom began with some background on her and her boyfriend's relationship.
The woman noted that even though they are young (she is 23, and he is 24) they have been in an on and off relationship for the past four years. Though she acknowledged they've had many problems any "normal" couple has had, she feels like his parents have been the biggest thorn in her side.
"My boyfriend comes from a very upper class family and I don’t. We met when he was in college for a high pay job and I was just waitressing. They have always thought I was just there for money."
Despite the ups and downs, the pair had an unplanned (but well-loved) baby girl. She claims his parents were upset about the pregnancy from the start.
From the very beginning they had insisted that the baby wasn't her boyfriend's child. Despite intervention from her partner, she said they continued to insinuate her child was fathered by someone else.
When her daughter was born six months ago, the new mom was pleasantly surprised that her boyfriend's parents stepped up to the plate.
The mom said that her daughter was treated with so much love and attention, and they were always willing to help out when the two of them needed a break.
The affection mom was gaining for them quickly disappeared, however, when her boyfriend returned home from their house in a horrible mood. He eventually confessed that his parents let it slip that they had a DNA test conducted when the baby was a month old so they could confirm that she was actually his daughter.
To say the mom was mad would be an understatement.
She immediately called them and told them that she was "done." The new mom stood up for herself and said that she didn't want her daughter "around people that thought so little of me and would obviously only try and convince her of the nonsense they think about me."
They "apologized" but insisted that they were doing what was best for their son and that the mom couldn’t blame them for trying to be "good parents."
Although her boyfriend totally understands her anger, he is begging her to reconsider because he still wants a relationship with them and appreciated their help.
Now the new mom is faced with a dilemma: Does she try to move on and let them back into their lives, or does she stand her ground?
Many people in the Reddit thread backed up the new mom 100%.
“'Good parents' would support their son in his decision not to question his daughter’s paternity, not get a DNA test behind his back," wrote one commenter. "Plus, their apology was clearly fake if they were trying to convince you that what they did was right. They have proven themselves to be dishonest and untrustworthy, and who needs grandparents like that?"
Another person noted just how devious the entire thing was.
"By the sounds of it they got the test not as confirmation the child was his, but to try and prove the child wasn't. They tried to use a child as a weapon against you."
Others agreed that she had every right to be angry, but cutting them off might be extreme.
"[Y]our boyfriend needs to be the one who makes his own decision about how involved he is in their lives and you have to accept that. Controlling your partner is not the way to go, I hope he sees the light, but please do not accuse him of not caring if he does decide to see them from time to time (with your kid though that must be a joint decision)."
One thing everyone can agree on is that they have to do what is truly best for their baby girl.
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