It's strange times out there, and one of the strangest part of it is all us parents who are stuck at home with our kids, ALL EVER LOVING DAY. That's right. 24/7 for weeks — nay, months — on end. No school, no activities, and not even lots of outside time, with no definitive end in sight.
So what's a parent to do who's losing their mind, slowly but surely? Tweet, of course! In the age of self-isolation, Twitter has been teeming with nuggets of joy and hilarity from parents everywhere. After all, what else do parents have time for than to steal a minute in the bathroom alone to shoot out a quick tweet? Not much, that's what. So take a few minutes alone today and read these so-relatable-it-hurts tweets from other parents reminding us that we are not alone in this chaos we call life stuck at home with kids.
Way Too Close
Don't speak, don't speak, don't speak so close to me … said every parent in lockdown everywhere. Seriously, though, it's like little kids don't understand the concept of personal space. Can the 6-foot social distance rule happen inside the house too?
What Time Is It Anyway?
THIS. Who needs to get dressed when you're not going anywhere? It's just one less battle to fight in these already trying times, right? We say that's called a parenting hack.
I Swear We're Crafting ...
Hey, in times like these, no one will be judging the hours of screen time — promise. At this point, it's just survival mode. We gotta do what we gotta do.
Snacks Are Precious
Those were Mommy's snacks! What is it about kids that they seem to want to eat all day long?! There aren't enough grocery deliveries in the world to satiate those never-ending appetites. Pro tip: Hide Mommy's personal stash of snacks in a place they'd never want to look — like where the cleaning supplies are kept.
Silence Is Golden
Yup, it's no longer actual social interactions and faces of other people we're missing — it's alone time. And quiet. Oh, sweet, sweet silence, we will never take you for granted again. Seriously, a one-week stay at a hotel ALONE sounds good right about now.
Let's Hear It for the Tablets
iPads, laptops, Smart TVs, old phones — there are no rules when it comes to lockdown. And we'll take them all. Thanks for the helpful co-parenting, guys. We couldn't do it without you.
Bath Time Is Now the Best Time
Who knew that the act of tossing our kids in an enclosed bathtub would become the highlight of our day? Toss in some toys or, heck, some measuring cups and other random stuff, and BOOM! We've just bought ourselves half an hour. Score!
Hide & Don't Seek
For the love of all that is good in this world, can we just get a minute to ourselves?! If hiding in the pantry is what it takes, then hiding in the pantry is what's going to happen. Period. No shame in our game.
Just the Basics
Who do they think we are?! Is there any parent out there who sincerely loves to color? Asking for a friend …
A Schedule We Can Get Behind
But where on this list is eat your secret snack in a dark corner while oh-so-carefully peeling back the wrapper so your child with crazy hearing powers doesn't hear you and race over to demand yet another "snack"?
On Repeat, All Day, Every Day
There are definitely worse songs for a child to sing over and over again, but who are we kidding? In this current situation, they're all bad.
Mommy's Trying Here
Common Core math wasn't meant for moms and dads. Come Christmastime, all you kids better watch out. While we're at it, why not just break out that dusty old Elf on the Shelf now? What have we got to lose, parents?
Some Perspective
A little perspective never hurt anyone — it's always good to remind kids that they could have it worse. Way worse. Oh, who are we kidding? Let's all just keep adding to that future therapy jar at this point.
Call It a Family Recipe
Cooking when we're supposed to be going to the grocery store very sparingly has proven a new challenge for many parents. It's called "What can I make with the stuff we have left in the fridge that no one ever wants to eat?"
We Can Hear You ...
Yes, we committed to be all in this together, but not THIS together. Being surrounded by each other 24/7 is beyond hard, but we are all going to make it through … right?! Right?! OK, BRB. Going to head to the bathroom for some "alone time."
Best Parenting Hack Ever
Ummm, this is the MOST GENIUS IDEA we've ever heard! And we're totally going to go play some hide-and-seek ASAP — even if it takes our kids three hours to find us (perhaps eventually given away by the sound of snoring.) We won't tell if you don't.
All Lies
That's right, Karen. We don't need to see pictures of your perfectly curated Moana-themed lunch party that no one asked for. And if your kids aren't wearing pajamas under that costume, we will never be friends again.
