Throwing kids' birthday parties can be rather complicated, especially when it comes to making the guest list. Some people feel as though a parent should invite every kid in their child's class so no one feels left out or excluded. But others believe that's totally unnecessary. Many fall somewhere in the middle, and agree there's a "right way" to go about it, without inviting everyone.
Recently, one mother took to Reddit's "Am I the A–hole" forum to share that she has received a ton of backlash from other moms at her son's school after she decided not to invite every child in her his class to his birthday party.
The mom said her 8-year-old son had just had his first year in "big kids' school."
It was her first time dealing with a situation like this, because he had done distance learning throughout the health crisis. She said her son made friends with kids in his class, but that when it came time for his birthday party she couldn't invite everyone. She explained in the forum that she was not doing super well financially.
"Like most families, our consumer debt piled on and we are throwing every spare cent at it," she wrote. So she decided to only invite five students from his class to his birthday party to keep costs down.
She was careful about how she did this, though.
The mom sent the birthday party invites to the kids' houses instead of having her son give them out in class in front of others. She also sent in cupcakes and juice boxes to the school for her son's birthday, so all the kids in his class could celebrate with him.
For the actual birthday party, she asked parents to send the kids over in bathing suits and she provided them water guns for a water fight. She kept it within budget by making a "pizza station" with flour tortillas and toppings for DIY pizza. She also made small cakes from a box mix, as well as sugar cookies.
The following Monday at school, all the kids were talking about the party.
"The kids would not stop raving about how fun the party was, how it was the best birthday party ever. The other kids were not happy to not be invited," the mom explained on Reddit. She ended up getting a ton of backlash from the mothers of the kids who were not invited to the party.
"I said that I am sorry, but it was a small party for his close friends only. They kept complaining about me excluding their kids," she wrote. And six months and a new school year later, many parents are still giving her grief about excluding their children.
Many on Reddit don't see a problem with how she handled the party.
Many people on Reddit pointed out that it's not as though she invited most of the class and left two kids out.
"You invited FIVE children," commented one Reddit user. "I am honestly boggled at any parents that think it’s okay to confront you about the fact their child was not invited. That is absurd honestly."
Some didn't understand how anyone thought their kid was excluded.
"You did everything right," one person commented. "You sent treats for the class, you sent invitations to private homes rather than inviting kids at school, and it sounds like you gave your son a fantastic, creative party on a shoestring budget. You’re a good mom."
Many Reddit users said that the parents who complain are setting poor examples for their own children.
Dozens of Reddit users felt that it is crazy for parents to expect their children to be invited to every single party.
One person wrote: "These parents are setting terrible examples for their children. Not everybody is invited to sit at every table — nor should they expect to be. It is perfectly okay to have small birthday parties with the kids your son considers his close friends."
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
