
There are certain moments in life in which you're not only allowed, but expected, to step into and own the spotlight entirely. Most would agree a baby shower is one of those moments. That's why an expectant mom on Reddit is lamenting the fact that her baby shower was co-opted by a friend who previously faced fertility struggles but decided to make her pregnancy announcement during the original poster's celebration.
The OP wrote that both she and her friend Chloe are 28.
The OP is single. "I have always wanted to be a mom and I have never felt I needed a partner to do it," wrote the OP. "So, I decided to use a sperm donor through an official agency and got pregnant."
Meanwhile, Chloe and her husband had been trying since their wedding three years ago with no luck. That's why the OP said she had to be "careful" when she told her good friend that she was expecting. "She was one of the first people I told and told her I had no expectations of her being there for me, as I know it could be hard," the OP recalled. "She told me no, she wanted to support me and be in my corner. I told her if she needed to walk away at any point, I’d understand."
A friend threw the OP a Zoom baby shower recently.
"We were all having fun, doing our stuff…when suddenly Chloe gets really emotional and says she has something to say. She then announces that part of her gift to me is that my daughter will have a playmate," wrote the OP. "She then said that she was pregnant. After that, the entire shower became about her. People fussing over her, asking questions and being overall excited. I was too and congratulated her but felt like it was inappropriate."
When it came time to send her thank-yous, the OP connected with Chloe, who was over the moon about her pregnancy.
The OP said she matched her friend's enthusiasm, but when Chloe asked if she was OK, she was honest. "I said I felt her announcement was inappropriate and took the spotlight away from me," recalled the OP. "I said she could’ve easily told us separately. Chloe said she thought it was cute and I said, 'It was but I’m only ever going to have one kid. How would you felt if I had hijacked your shower?'"
Chloe responded by accusing the OP "of not being happy for her (not true!) and being selfish." She continued, "Our mutual friend is now calling me a [expletive] and insensitive."
The OP then turned it over to Redditors, asking if she was in the wrong. "I feel bad for Chloe but I got 15 minutes of a shower and the rest was basically dedicated to her," wrote the mom-to-be.
Redditors overwhelmingly sided with the OP.
"Don't make someone else's major event about you. It is a basic rule," wrote one commenter.
Another noted, "I understand Chloe waited a long time for this, and it sounds like you two are close so I hope you can work this out, but it was very selfish of her to announce this way. She owes you an apology."
One Redditor even shared what a situation like this should look like.
She wrote: "My sister and I were pregnant at the same time with our first babies… She told me that she was going to announce that she was pregnant at Thanksgiving, so I waited for two to three weeks then announced mine so I wouldn’t steal her thunder at all."
Here's hoping the OP realizes not only did she do nothing wrong but that her friend might need to work on her self-awareness — and say she's sorry.
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