Plenty of women can attest to the power of transforming your hair. There’s nothing quite like the feeling of being spun around in the chair to the vision for your new look come to life. The act of changing our looks is not only a good boost of confidence, it’s empowering.
But how young is too young to begin making these decisions? That’s the question many are pondering after one mother allowed her 5-year-old daughter to bleach her hair. Mom shamers on TikTok came out in full force for this one.
The woman's daughter wanted to go blond so she could eventually color her hair pink.
Demi Engemann, a TikTok influencer, documented the whole process of her daughter taking her hair from brown to blond. Engemann let her daughter, 5-year-old Maude, skip a day of kindergarten so the two could have a mommy-and-me salon day. Engemann said the idea was entirely her daughter’s. Engemann’s daughter asked if she could lighten her hair so she could later color it pink.
The TikToker encouraged parents to say yes more.
Based on the TikTok, Maude looks elated with how her hair looks. She looked in the mirror and applauded the new blond shade. In the caption for the video, Engemann, 28, wrote, “Here’s your sign to say 'yes' more.” In other videos, Engemann shows her daughter staring in the mirror, enamored with her new hair color.
Engemann posted the video as a cute mommy-daughter moment, and some people received it that way.
“This is precious,” one user wrote. "She’ll remember this forever ."
Another user had this same experience with her mom and shared that it was indeed a special moment: “My mom did this to my hair and I swear I was grown and on a league of my own. Cherish these moments!”
But other thought this was a terrible idea … for several reasons.
Many took issue with Engemann putting strong chemicals in her child’s hair.
“Colour kids hair – yes," one user responded. "BLEACHING IT – HELL NO.”
Others recommended temporary dyes and washes that would have allowed Maude to achieve the pink look she was after.
Some people who were also allowed to dye their hair as children didn’t have a great experience.
“This is one thing I can’t bring myself to say yes to I was allowed to dye my hair as a kid & it damaged it so much it took me till my 20’s to get [sic],” one user shared.
Others wondered if changing her hair color would discourage Maude from loving and embracing her brown hair.
“My mom did this to me too and it took me 18 years to be comfortable and love my true self as a brunette again,” one commenter confessed.
Still, the mom does not regret her decision.
Despite the many naysayers, Engemann told Inside Edition she does not regret her decision.
“Is it the best thing for her, the chemicals?" she said. "You could argue, probably not. But at the end of the day, the upside was that she would feel happy, confident and stoked on this.” For her, that was worth it.
A dermatologist said bleaching is not inherently unsafe, even for children.
For those who worried about strong hair chemicals, dermatologist Dr. Doris Day said, “I don’t have an objection as a dermatologist using chemicals to change the color of your hair, even in children if it’s done properly and carefully and if that child does not have a sensitivity to that ingredient.”
When Inside Edition asked Maude if the blond hair gave her more confidence, she chimed in to speak for herself, “Yeah,” she said looking up at her mother.
