Woman Who Takes Her 7-Year-Old to Burning Man Every Year Claps Back at Mommy Shamers

@highsocietymama/TikTok

Every last one of us parents in the way that feels right for us. And many of us can relate to the notion of the decisions we make as mothers being questioned, critiqued, or outright condemned by others.

This is particularly true when you share your decisions with people on social media. One mother caught a lot of flak for her decision to take her young son to the Burning Man festival, not once, but nearly every year since he was born, and she has an interesting perspective about all of it.

Bianca Snyder says there is no right way to do Burning Man.

The festival, which takes place in the Nevada desert, is known for not just being for adults, it also has a reputation for nudity, drugs, and sex. But Bianca Snyder, who goes by @HighSocietyMama on TikTok, explained that it’s the perfect opportunity to teach her child in a unique environment. She explained simply, “We do Burning Man the wrong way because there is no right way.” As you can imagine, the reactions to her choice have been mixed.

People wondered about the sexual activity at the festival.

@highsocietymama We do Burning Man the wrong way because there is no right way. #burningman #burningman2022 @High Society Mama cannamom AF ♬ original sound - High Society Mama cannamom AF

“Ain’t there like people having orgies at burning man,” one woman asked. In response to another comment about orgies, Snyder wrote, “Hmmm I guess if that’s what you think burning man is all about then you can live in that reality.” The festival describes itself as a “participative temporary metropolis,” according to its website.

This has been Snyder’s 12th Burning Man, she told Insider. She first brought her son when he was still in utero and nearly every year since. “Our son goes everywhere that we go and that’s just the way that we live,” Snyder said.

People shamed her the most for breastfeeding her son at the festival.

@highsocietymama Have you ever experienced Mom shaming? Motherhood is a unique journey, filled with trials, triumphs, and countless decisions. Unfortunately, the criticism of our parenting choices aka ‘mom-shaming’ by others - can taint this beautiful experience by imposing unhealthy expectations and guilt for our decisions. It can negatively impact our mental health, leading to stress, anxiety, and unnecessary self-doubt. Remember, there’s no ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach to parenting. These are some of the hurtful words from internet trolls about my breastfeeding at Burning Man: that child is too old to breastfeed (my son wasn’t even 2) disgusting totally gross! what kind of crap parents take their little kid to a week long drûgg festival in the desert? why is her pre-teen sucking her breast? I don’t need to see this, the kid looks 4 Here are some tips to personally combat mom-shaming: 1️⃣ Trust your instincts – You know your child & your journey better than anyone else. 2️⃣ Validate your feelings – It’s okay to feel hurt. Acknowledge your feelings and then let them go. 3️⃣ Seek support – Surround yourself with people who respect your parenting choices. 4️⃣ Practice self-care – Prioritize your mental health. It’s okay to ask for help or take a break. 5️⃣ Empower others – Encourage fellow mothers to be confident in their choices instead of criticizing them. We are all doing our best. Let’s foster a community of understanding, empathy, and respect for supporting moms. Check out #highsocietyofmamas on the other social space to expand your support network. Let’s say NO to mom-shaming and YES to supportive, positive parenting, including using plant medicine without any guilt. #momshaming #stopmomshamming #stopmomshaming #burningman #burningman2022 #burningmantips #confidentmom #breastfeed #breastfeedingmamasunite @High Society Mama cannamom AF ♬ original sound - High Society Mama cannamom AF

More than just their presence at the festival, social media users also took issue with Snyder breastfeeding her son at the event. "It was definitely a combination of people not liking public breastfeeding, and also, 'Why would you bring your child to a drug festival?'" she said.

Someone even took it as far as suggesting that they should call Child Protective Services. While Snyder took it very seriously, it also encouraged her to double down on her convictions.

Now, she is dedicated to using her platform to not only raise awareness about mom-shaming, she wants to inspire other families to “live an alternative lifestyle.”

'There's people experiencing art,' Snyder said.

While drugs and sex are present at the festival, Snyder told Insider, she tailors it to her family’s needs. "You can cultivate the experience that you want to have, and you're not subject to those extremes if you don't want to be," she said. "There's people doing yoga, there's people having important conversations that are relevant to improving the future of mankind. There's people experiencing art."

Snyder says the festival teaches her son how to socialize as well.

Snyder and her son mostly bike around the desert and look at the art installations. She says attending the festival every year has helped with her son’s socialization skills. She says there are benefits for the other festivalgoers as well because they get to witness the joy of the festival through the eyes of a child.

If they do stumble upon something like nudity, Snyder says it can be a learning opportunity. "That's not something that I think that a child needs to be sheltered from because we are all humans," she said. "We all have that same anatomy."

If they see people who are a little too drunk, Snyder says, "It's teaching him how to handle real-life situations that he is going to encounter."

While we may not all agree, it sounds like Snyder is making an intentional and thoughtful decision for family, and well … that's what a good mother does.