12 Signs You’re a Social Media Junkie

Do you use The Twitter? Do you complain bitterly on the interwebs every time Facebook changes something minor? (It’s major! It’s always major!) Is your cellphone superglued to your hand?

You may be a social media junkie. There is currently no cure for this, short of an electromagnetic pulse that would basically just wipe out all electronics, and if that happens, you’ll probably have bigger things to worry about than tweeting — like your bank balance.

Here are 12 signs you’re a social media junkie.

1. You have at least three Twitter apps on your phone, each one signed into a different account. You find that’s easier than toggling between screen names in a single app, and you don’t want to have any embarrassing mistweets.
2. When you go somewhere with a friend, upon arriving, the first thing out of your mouth is, "Are you checking us in on Facebook or should I?"
3. Your kid says a hilarious one-liner and follows it up immediately with, “Don’t tweet that!”
4. You’ve posted something from the gynecologist’s office. While you were on the table. With your feet in stirrups.
5. You have shed actual tears that Pinterest wasn’t around before you got married.
6. Since you don’t want to be a douche that Instagrams every course at dinner, you snap a pic of each plate (don’t forget the bread basket!) and then collage them together with Diptic.
7. You use Instagram as a verb.
8. You own multiple chargers. There’s one upstairs and one downstairs. An adapter in the car. There’s one in your purse. You know which bars have accessible outlets, and you make sure to tip the bartender well for keeping an eye on your precious phone.
9. Your mom calls to see if you're OK because you haven't tweeted all day.
10. If you’re an iPhone user, you see Android users as either wannabes or hipster nonconformists. Or wannabe hipster nonconformists.
11. If you’re an Android user, you see iPhone users as pretentious lemmings.
12. You’re nodding your head right now, because this list basically describes your life. Go ahead, hit the share button and tweet it out. You know you want to.

Are you a social media junkie?

Image via Jason Howie/Flickr