It's no secret that weddings cost money — and LOTS of it. And we're not just talking about the cost of throwing a wedding. Merely attending a wedding can get pretty pricey these days, which can sometimes be the deciding factor between RSVP'ing "yes" or "no." But it seems one bride-to-be on Reddit doesn't think that's a good enough reason, and she's seriously annoyed that her friend isn't taking time off from work to attend her wedding.
In a Reddit post, the bride explained that she and her fiancé had gone all out for her friend's wedding but were annoyed he wouldn't do the same.
She and her intended attended her friend's wedding in their hometown last month on a Friday, which she felt was a pretty big effort.
According to the poster, however, her male friend is "a bit lazy when it comes to socializing and isn't the type to go out of his way unless it benefits him." Still, she was hurt when he RSVP'd no to her wedding, and can't seem to get over his reason. Although he lives 14 hours away from their hometown, she attended his ceremony and had to get time off work to do so, so it was only fair he make an effort to attend her wedding, she reasoned.
"We received an RSVP from them saying that the [guy] isn't coming because of not getting paid from work and already taking time off for X-Mas in which I believe the couple will be here for (but leave before my wedding on Jan 17)," she explained.
But there's just something about that reasoning that bothers her.
"My partner and I made arrangements to attend their wedding on a Friday," she wrote. "And if my partner didn't want to make arrangements I would have talked him into making an effort."
A lot of people felt the bride was being ... well, a bit bridezilla-ish.
"Now I see why you would think he doesn’t want to come because of you — I wouldn’t want to go to a 'friend’s' wedding if they were as rude, self-absorbed, and entitled as you either," one commenter wrote. "I suspect that you secretly know you’re the problem and this is why you’re projecting things like laziness, stinginess, and dishonesty onto him. Get a grip."
"Yes. You're coming off as extremely petty," a second person agreed. "Most people won't want to take time off without getting paid. And many places won't give you more time off if you have already booked time off recently. Maybe don't act so entitled. This sort of behavior costs you friends."
OUCH.
Another person was a bit kinder on the poster, but wrote plainly.
"You’re not wrong to be annoyed, it’s an annoying situation," the person shared. "But they’re probably annoyed too, that they can’t make it, and to be offended is going overboard."
But the bride stood her ground -- she didn't think she was being rude or petty. In fact, quite the opposite.
Later on in the thread, the poster shared that she was hoping her wedding would be the "exception" to her friend's laziness "and not wanting to spend 'unnecessary' money traits."
"He was also a part of the surprises I had for my group of friends so it's something I have to re-organize," she added.
At the end of the day, she feels more hurt by the fact that the friend doesn't seem to do for others what they would do for him.
"I believe it's just typical of him to not put effort in to attend like my fiancée and I did with his wedding," she concluded. "I'm a business owner and I lost wages that day and my partner is a police officer and had to pull some strings to take the day off."
Plus, she added, it's not as if the friend is strapped for cash.
"They have money," she said. "They earn $100,000 a year between them. He's stingy."
Unfortunately for the bride, whether or not she agrees with her friend's decision, she's gonna have to let it go. At the end of the day, how we choose to spend our money and time is up to us — and it's not always personal.
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