Getting a tattoo requires a bit of a decision-making process. People who get tattoos all the time often try to top their existing ink or at least add to its splendor. Sometimes, they already have so many tattoos that getting another one is like ordering Chick-Fil-A. You just gotta do it. For people getting their first-ever tattoo, it can get a little more serious. Still, no matter what a person's level of tattoo experience is, one would think that absolutely no one would get an ugly tattoo on purpose, right? Wrong!
There is a population of folks who live for life's quirks and that includes hiring a tattoo artist who can't draw to permanently ink their bodies with artwork that's so ugly, it's actually perfect.
Meet Helena Fernandes, the in-demand tattoo artist who can't draw.
Fernandes lives in Brazil and founded a home tattoo studio called Malfeitona. She cannot draw like an expert, knows it, and that's exactly why her clients seek her out. Her ability to create imperfect images allows her to provide one-of-a-kind tattoos with ugliness and quirkiness that makes them actually look cute and edgy.
Fernandes calls her tattoos tatuagens peba, which is Portuguese for "trash tattoos."
The aesthetic looks very much like a drawing you might find scribbled in a schoolgirl's notebook. Still, it manages to look whimsy and cool. This tattoo is of a rainbow with an upset cloud at the end of it. Fernandes noted that this particular tattoo was difficult, as it required a lot more shading and the client wanted it to have a gray scale.
The best part about Fernandes' bad tattoos is that she never does the same design twice.
Check out this creepy cute owl! "… We do not know if she looks scared [or] attentive," she wrote about the owl in Portuguese on Instagram. "This look is an unknown of contemporary art that arouses curiosity and can be interpreted from different points of view."
I vote that the spider doesn't look scared or attentive, but instead looks like she's about to ask HOO the heck you think you're talking to. (Get it? Ha!)
She does a ton of cats — all of which look different, of course.
Fernandes called this tattoo o gato de bolas, which means "the ball cat." I didn't catch the meaning of the ball cat at first. The closer I looked at the photo, the more I got it. Did you get it yet? LMAO. Wow, OK. Let's move on now.
Here lies a cat tattoo that's actually safe for work.
This is a leopard if you couldn't tell by the simplistic way Fernandes drew the spots. I also LOVE how colorful this tattoo is. She even drew grass in the exact way I would have drawn it. Three little sharply cut symbols in green and you get the freaking point! You gotta live for the straightforward fun she has with her tattoos.
Speaking of colors!
Look at how cute, vibrant, and minimal these matching rainbow tattoos are. They look like a kid drew them, yes, but that's the charm! Fernandes' aesthetic brings an extra dose of fun to the concept of tattooing. Also, I imagine a simple rainbow like this is pretty quick and affordable to get.
Do you remember this little guy?
If you're age 25 or older, then you recognize this animated paper clip from the old Microsoft Word days! He was the little helper who would answer any of your questions about how to use computers. Of course, this was back when computers were still foreign enough to need help with simple stuff like Microsoft Word. Anywho, the little helper is cute and has been honored forever with this fun tattoo.
Need some extra luck and a few wishes granted?
I live for a corny pun, even when it's done visually. Did anyone else not think of the phrase, "Wish upon a star"? Get it? That's a wishbone and there are tiny stars all around it. Don't let it just be me. This is super freaking cool!
Got a boo-boo?
Fernandes will make it all better with this adorable Band-Aid drawing. She even created tiny red dots to mimic the perforations in the actual Band-Aids. Of course, everything is better with a smile. Also, don't those mini red hearts remind you of all the ones you drew all over your grade school notebook while crushing on a Backstreet Boy?
Fernandes will basically turn your arm into an eternal comic book.
The little boy punching through the air is actually Alex Kidd from the Nintendo life game called Alex Kidd in Miracle World. In the videogame, there is an octopus which is what she drew closer to the bottom. What a sweet way to commemorate your favorite eighties video game. I can see her doing similar fun things with Dragon Ball Z characters or Sonic the Hedgehog!
How dope is this cloud raining hearts, though?
Now this is the "bad tattoo" I can see myself getting. And again, yesssss, these are the same little hearts I couldn't stop doodling on all of my school papers. Oh, the nostalgia. *books trip to Brazil for my first tat*
If you happen to be a J. Cole fan, then you get why this is the tattoo that made me freak entirely out.
The person who got Fernandes to draw this on them may not be a J.Cole fan, but I look at this tattoo and immediately think of his Born Sinner album cover and the accompanying merch. I want. I want. I freaking want!
So what nursery rhyme does this tattoo bring to mind?
"The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout/Down came the rain and washed the spider out/Out came the sun and dried up all the rain/And the itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again."
Why did we ever sing that?
Fernandes' ugly tattoos have even caught the eyes of John Mayer, who paid her a compliment.
An Instagram account called Sucky Tattoos posted this photo of Fernandes' work as yet another example of a tattoo gone wrong. But John Mayer had a different opinion. "It's good," the singer wrote simply in a comment about the Spider-Man tattoo. Like anyone, she fanned out completely. Check out this adorable video.
Bad tattoos now have a completely different reputation thanks to Fernandes.
How cute is this tiny spaceship?! Although most tattoo artists warn against finger tattoos because of how likely it is that they will fade, some are just way too cute to hate.
Also, cheers to a lady entrepreneur turning something she "can't do" into a thriving business.
There is always something to be said about turning what you (or others) think is a limitation or a flaw into a major success. It's like Kylie Jenner starting a business with her lip kits but way cooler. Consider this your inspiration for the day that your flaws can take you very far in life. Or, ya know, just consider this your reminder to get a real fire tattoo this summer.
