There's no shame in making your wedding day all about you and your new spouse. After all, you put a lot of time and effort into throwing an amazing party to celebrate your love, and you deserve the day to be about you. And when guests try to make it all about them … well, there are consequences.
That's how one bride on Reddit felt about her BIL who used her and her husband's big day to make it all about him.
The bride wrote that when her husband chose his brother to be his best man and he accepted, they were both thrilled because they are so close.
When the day finally arrived Kevin, her brother-in-law, showed up with his girlfriend, who she says was wearing the same color as her.
"Everyone took a seat, and just before the ceremony began, Kevin excused himself for a minute, I watched in shock as he walked up to his girlfriend, kneeled down and proposed to her," she wrote. "She took her time than said yes, next thing I knew my husband started clapping along with my mother in law and the rest of the family."
Taken aback, she started looking around as everyone offered their congratulations.
"I saw my bridesmaids hugging her and congratulating her while my mother-in-law rushed to stand next to her," she recalled. "I was confused, I stood their feeling so much anger that my legs couldn't stand. I had a few guests starring at me awkwardly and my mom walked out to get some air, I could tell she was upset [too]."
As everyone was finally getting seated, she noticed that family members still weren't paying attention to the ceremony and were congratulating Kevin and his fiancée.
"I was so angry that I dropped the ring while exchanging because my hand was literally shaking," she added. "Things then got quieter, Kevin asked for a dance with his girlfriend, I just sunk in my seat just cursing and feeling enraged."
Getting fed up, the bride asked to privately speak with her new husband and his brother.
The bride then told her BIL that she didn't appreciate his decision and that it really took away from her and her husband's day. He argued that he "couldn't find a better time to do it" and that he had already gotten his brother's blessing.
"…my husband said he was pressured by his mom to do that and tried to say it wasn't a big deal," she wrote that she learned. "I got so fed up I told Kevin to just leave. He tried to argue, I told him it was my wedding, just leave. He rushed out and his girlfriend and mom followed after. His mom yelled at me saying I had no right, it was an overall horrible situation."
Since the wedding, she hasn't seen her in-laws.
"Ever since, they didn't stop texting me, and calling me all types of names and how I hurt their son's feelings because he did nothing wrong," she said. "I'm so royally pissed at my husband and I just can't move past this, it's awful, they could've picked another time but it was deliberate all because my in-laws hate me and have no respect for me."
So now she wants to know if she was out of line for her reaction or totally within her rights.
People were pretty unanimously on the bride's side.
"You never use someone else's wedding as an opportunity to propose to your own SO unless everyone involved gives their permission beforehand, and no one bothered to get yours," consoled one user. "Your day was stolen from you, and you have every right to be angry."
Others pointed out that her husband was just as guilty in this situation.
"How are you just gonna allow your brother to propose at your wedding and not tell the person you're marrying," questioned another reader. "When you're in a serious relationship, you work together as a team. He's already starting their marriage with secrecy."
One person even suggested that they owe her financially.
"Since they hijacked your wedding, they can fork over half what you paid for it," one person suggested. "It was your day, not only did they ruin it for you, but tried to get a free party for it."
We hope that this family can make work things out soon. It's a truly the wrong way to start off a life together.
These stories are based on posts found on Reddit. Reddit is a user-generated social news aggregation, web content rating, and discussion website where registered members submit content to the site and can up- or down-vote the content. The accuracy and authenticity of each story cannot be confirmed by our staff.
