How I faced my biggest body insecurity by making it the focal point of my look

I pride myself on being body positive. I accept and love my body as it is. But still, there's one thing that I'm self-conscious about. It's not my stomach; I love crop tops. 

It's my chubby hands. 

When you grow up fat, you hear comments about every part of your body. (Opinions, as they say, are like assholes: everyone has one.) People have referred to my hands as "bear claws," "sausages," and other unflattering names. As a result, I shy away from rings, bracelets, or anything that highlights my hands. To break free of one of my biggest fears, I decided to draw as much attention to my chubby hands as possible.

My insecurity about my hands began at a young age: a boy in school made fun of the fact that my knuckles didn't show.

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At night I would "exercise" them by closing and opening my fists over and over until it hurt. I pressed my knuckles against walls to try and make them broader and more pronounced.

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The thickness of my wrists also bothered me. I remember when my classmates would connect their middle finger and thumb around their wrist to measure the size. I tried it and was mortified that my fingers didn't touch.

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Crossover banglegold metal chevron ring, Ny2you; silver knuckle rings, Laila Rowe; sterling silver barrel clasp, Pandora

So here I am, styling my hands with knuckle rings and posting the pictures on the Internet. Everyone has to face their fears at some point.

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I'll admit that I did not enjoy having my hands photographed.

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Also, the rings and bracelets slowed down my typing and made me feel a little constricted. My "sausage fingers," as many have called them, have gotten used to going commando.

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However, I did enjoy texting with my newly blinged hands. And after hours of wearing the accessories, I went from purposely ignoring my hands to focusing on them. I had to re-type a text twice because my knuckle bling distracted me.

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I was getting sassy and comfortable. At one point I even felt like showing off my hands. I started to play with my hair as I spoke to draw attention to my rings.

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As the day went by, the knuckle rings came off one by one and I realized a lighter bling was more my style. I may start accessorizing my hands more often. Who cares if they look like glamorous sausages?

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