Buying Christmas presents can be stressful — even if you’re super-organized. But if you’re one of those people who insists on buying all of your gifts early, any unplanned change can really throw you off track. Take one person who recently wrote to Mumsnet to vent about her sister-in-law who apparently gave her the wrong list. Now the Original Poster has to return everything and buy new presents — but is that really fair?
As the OP explained in a post on Mumsnet, every year her SIL gives her a list for her two nephews.
Usually the gifts cost around $100, the OP wrote, and normally she buys one big present “and few bits on it.”
This year, the list, sent at the end of October or beginning of November, consisted of seven items “all ranging between [$6 to $20]” she wrote. Thinking nothing of it and because it fit her budget, she “bought all the presents on the list, because I like to be organized.”
But now — whoops! — it turned out her SIL made a mistake.
The OP just got a new list because her SIL accidentally sent her the list meant for her family.
“As there are six siblings they spend less per child with there being so many,” she explained.
The SIL sent the list with a note “saying sorry her family have bought the gifts so could I just return mine and buy from the amended list, as when she sent it to them [last] week [and now] realized she had sent me the same one.”
Returning the gifts won’t be that easy.
For one thing, the OP bought her gifts more than a month ago, “so probably cannot return all of them and get a refund.” She argued that her SIL should probably get her family to return their gifts, as they’d bought them more recently.
And for the other, the OP was ticked that now she’d have to go Christmas shopping again and it's a very busy time at her job.
“Why should I start Christmas shopping again, hunting down presents which may not even arrive for Christmas?” she asked.
The OP is afraid to bring it up because she doesn’t want to rock the boat.
Normally the OP and her SIL have a good relationship, but she’s nervous to say anything because her brother is her last living family member after their mom died last year.
“Part of me thinks I should just buy from the new list and return what I can, but part of me is a bit annoyed that she knows me and my brother struggle at Christmas having buried our dad 2016 and this being mom's anniversary and she should have just done a new list for her family,” she explained.
Some people thought the OP needed to tell her SIL that it wasn't going to happen.
"Just say, sorry no it's too late to return mine as it's past the return date, hope your family can return theirs and leave it with her to deal with," one person advised.
"Say sorry but you can’t return yours so she’ll have to think of some other things for them to buy," someone else agreed.
"Just say sorry I really don’t have time but happy to drop them to you with receipts if you want to sort it before Xmas," a third commenter added.
But other people thought she should try to buy from the new list.
"I'd return what I could, give her the list of what you can't, and buy from the new list," wrote one person. "Unless you absolutely can't afford the time. It's a bit churlish not to. Is your brother doing anything to do with Christmas? Perhaps she is overstretched?"
"Do you still have the receipts? It's crap but I would try," another commenter chimed in. "It sounds like it was a genuine mistake. I know it's a hassle."
A third commenter thought the oversight was NBD: "She's made a mistake, s— happens!" the person wrote. "Your brother couldn't have made that mistake as he doesn't deal with Christmas. To err is human, if you can help them do, if you can't then explain."
And that, as annoying as it is, might be the best way for the OP to keep the peace.
