Splitting Upward: Episode 4
I wish I'd had the Splitting Upward podcast to listen to while I was going through my divorce. This week, co-hosts Jesenia and Julie's special guest, Jonna Spilbor, is a divorce attorney who offers some great advice about getting the whole process started, which can be the kick in the pants you need.
Let's face it, divorce is a long process and many of us are in for a long road whether we realize it or not. It's best to have some foresight before diving in — something I certainly wish I'd had more of it.
I thought when my ex-husband and I started the process, my feelings would be cut and dry when the papers were signed. We divorced a few months after he moved out and the process was easy for both of us — we didn't fight, argue, or go back and forth about money or custody agreements. So, because of how easy the process was, and because we were still friends, I thought I'd get over the fact that our 16-year marriage was over a lot more quickly.
The hardest thing about divorce? The feelings that never go away
Who’s making me happy? Me.
These days, I feel like the sky is the limit because my divorce allowed me to try so many things — from taking a trip alone to leaning how to change a light fixture. Things I never would have done if I was still married.
It's shown me just how capable I am to me make me happy without depending on a partner because, yes, I'm the only one in charge here. How my life turns out is up to me.
I don't want to spend it in sadness, or think I can't "do relationships." I want to take what I've learned from my marriage — and my divorce — and use the lessons for the second half of my life — because no one else is going to do it for me. And I deserve the best life I can create for myself.
Listen to Episode 4 of Splitting Upward:
