What to Know
There’s truly nothing like becoming a mom for the very first time — or all the brand new worries and fears that come along with the experience. It can be especially stressful for some moms to welcome a new baby during the cold and flu season, knowing how even the mildest of illnesses can be more dangerous to a newborn.
This means a lot of moms out there have made a rule that no one is allowed to kiss their baby, but when one mom on TikTok went viral for the way she “gently” reminds her mom to follow that rule, she ended up sparking some serious debate.
The new mom claims it’s all about boundaries.
@haeli.christiansen the word of the day is “boundaries” 😂 #firsttimemom #newmomlife #motherhood #momsoftiktok #momhumor ♬ original sound – bestspedup
In the video, we can see the mom in question, Haeli Christiansen, watching as her mom goes to kiss the newborn in her arms. But before she can, Haeli lightly slaps her mom in the forehead, making her stop.
“Gently reminding my mom not to kiss my newborn,” she wrote in the video.
Some people were pretty horrified she’d treat her own mom that way.
This video led to some very strong opinions on both sides of the argument, especially those who didn’t believe she handled the situation in the right way.
“My mom can kiss on her grandchildren all she wants,” one person commented.
A fellow mom wrote, “May this relationship with my children never find me.”
Others were on her side.
There were other moms who totally understood her point of view on this, and one commenter who said they work in a hospital backed her up completely.
“Not to be THAT person, but as someone who works in an ER with a pediatric unit I’ve seen some very sick babies since the holidays,” they said. “They come in with flu A and RSV, that turns into pneumonia. It’s all very sad and preventable. Good job protecting your little one. Their immune systems are delicate.”
The experts seem to agree. Johns Hopkins Medicine recommends against letting anyone kiss your new baby, because of the germs their mouths can carry. The hospital also advises that visitors thoroughly wash their hands before holding the baby, and to consider removing any jewelry they may be wearing on their hands.
Her “no kissing” rule comes from her own childhood experiences.
Haeli talked to People about her video, explaining why she’s so adamant about nobody, including her mom, kissing her baby.
“My husband and I made the decision to not have extended family or friends kiss our newborn for the first few months after birth because he was born in the middle of ‘sick season’ and newborns don’t have an immune system,” she told the outlet. “A common cold for adults could land a newborn in the hospital and be a life-threatening situation.”
As a baby herself, her health was put at risk. She added, “When I was a baby, I was hospitalized twice on two separate occasions from family kissing me without realizing they were sick. So my mom is actually one of the biggest advocates for not kissing my baby herself.”
Not kissing babies is a great boundary to set to keep everyone as healthy as possible… with or without the gentle slap involved!
