Thanks to breastfeeding, my baby's supposed to be really smart. So why do I feel so dumb? Ever since I gave birth, my brain has felt like a pile of mush, despite promises of a new-and-improved Mommy Brain. I leave appliances on all over the apartment, walk into a room and can't remember what I came in there for, and even forget to pay bills!
Yet the one thing I never forget to do is feed my baby. I have ADHD where all other things are concerned.
Case in point: The other night my husband and I went out on our first real date night since our daughter was born. We were celebrating an anniversary and left our baby in the care of three experienced friends supplied with several bottles of breast milk. Everything was in place for a relaxing night out.
Except I couldn't relax, and I couldn't concentrate. Sitting in a nice restaurant just blocks from our apartment — where our baby was totally safe — I found my mind wandering to thoughts of our little angel, and even though I'd promised not to check my phone or send a text, I suddenly blurted out, "Oh, my God, I forgot to mention that if we're not back by 10:30, she can totally have that second bottle!" This was the only text message I was allowed to send.
What was more embarrassing, though, was that in the middle of dinner, I felt my milk coming in and suddenly grabbed my chest, completely forgetting the fact that we were in a nice, crowded restaurant. Yes, I was the crazy lady feeling myself up. Had I lost all manners since being cooped up at home with a baby? Apparently so. I'm sure the couple whose kid I was also staring at for about 20 minutes as he hungrily banged chopsticks on the table would agree.
Since breastfeeding is pretty much all I do (every two hours, to be precise, except for that unpredictable nighttime stretch), it's all I think about. When I'm not doing it, my brain is counting down the minutes until the next time, because my baby wants me to do it and so does my body.
It doesn't sound as catchy as Mommy Brain, but I'm pretty sure I've got Breastfeeding Brain. Maybe it does make me "dumb" in matters about the house, but it does make me smart when it comes to my baby.
Do you find yourself distracted by breastfeeding? Is it all you think about? Will that change over time?
