Before I had kids, I was a lifeguard for almost 10 years. In that time, I saw it all. Whether by forgetting to wear their swim trunks or proudly announcing they'd just peed in the pool, kids had so many ways to embarrass their parents, I had no idea.
If you think that all of my exposure to these mortifying moments made me immune from my own kids' embarrassing me — well, you weren't there when my kid very helpfully informed another kid that peeing in a pool is totally okay because everyone does it.
That child's mom didn't agree.
Thankfully, I'm not alone in my face's getting red from something other than the sun. Click on for these hilarious stories of summer fun gone super wrong.
Image via iStock.com/ArtMarie
Hush!
"We were at the community pool and my son LOUDLY said 'Hey! Is that the lifeguard with the cute butt?'
Apparently he overheard me and my friend gossiping about the hot guard. Even better was that a woman heard my son, glared at me, and said, 'That is my son and he is only 18!'
Yikes, I'm creepy." — Laurie W., Tucson, Arizona
Naked Swimmer
"My son was in swim lessons and seemed to be doing fine. I was playing on my phone and looked up to see something wet on the pool deck. He had wriggled out of his swim suit and was buck naked in the pool.
Thankfully the teacher had a sense of humor about it. But do you know how hard it is to get a wet 3-year-old back into trunks with everyone watching? I was sweating!" — Hannah M., Hudsonville, Michigan
Warm Spot
"My family got asked to pose for a picture for the parks and rec aquatics brochure. It was going fine until my son said 'the water just got so warm!'
No, it isn't what you are thinking. He didn't pee. MY HUSBAND DID. Later he told me that he just had to go and didn't want to interrupt the photographer. Ew." — Janet K., Saint Paul, Minnesota
Underwater
"My daughter was swimming with some friends and they seemed to be playing some sort of diving game. Then one of the boys shouted, 'Hey, Mom, we're hunting for big butts under water! I'm winning!'
Good game, kids, good game." — Ashley K., Toledo, Ohio
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Clear the Pool
"Yep, my toddler was the one who dropped a deuce and cleared the whole kiddie pool while the guards had to fish it out. Mortifying." — Kirsten J., Hudson, Wisconsin
Lake Rules
"There is an understood rule that you can go the bathroom in the lake. Should have clarified for my kid that this rule only applies to going #1 and NOT #2. Especially if you are standing on the beach at the time." — Name withheld by request
Time Out
"My son had some friends over to swim in our backyard pool. One of them was a girl who had 'blossomed' over the summer. At one point all the kids got out to have some pizza except my son. I didn't know what was going on, so I kept telling him to get out of the pool and he kept refusing.
Finally my husband clued me in that my son probably had an erection and was waiting it out. I'm SO not ready to be the mom of a teen boy." — Jennifer G., Mesa, Arizona
The Flasher
"A free piece of advice: If you take a toddler to the pool, always wear a suit with straps. Yes, the whole pool got to see my boobs, care of my 15-month-old who wanted to nurse and yanked my suit down." — Lisa A., Austin, Texas
Oldie Time
"I told my 4-year-old we were going to kiddie time at the pool. There was also an aqua aerobics class going on and my son saw the class and said, 'They aren't kids! This isn't old lady swim time!' at the top of his lungs. They all heard him." — Diane L., Oakdale, Minnesota
Hair Scare
"I usually wear shorts over my swimsuit but I forgot them last time we went to the pool. I haven't been keeping up on my bikini area maintenance, which my daughter oh-so-loudly pointed out as we got in the pool. Yes, people, I have pubes!"– Nancy D., Des Moines, Iowa
More from CafeMom: 10 Parenting Blunders So Embarrassing Police Were Called