Mothers are subject to all kinds of double standards in today's world: For example, you should definitely have it all and work full-time, but that also means that you don't love your kids. Or, all moms should stay home to raise their kids, but they should also be ashamed of themselves for not having any ambition. Don't be a helicopter parent, but if you let your kids go to the park across the street by themselves we're going to call CPS. And lastly, breastfeed your children — but only as long as you don't make anyone uncomfortable. It's this last belief that the Facebook group Breastfeeding Mama Talk took on in a post that's going viral.
Often, critics claim that they aren't against breastfeeding — they just think that women should do it more discreetly and "respectfully." From what we can tell, that means breastfeeding under a poncho while apologizing the entire time. Since when is "respectful breastfeeding" a thing? And why does it mean respecting the feelings of strangers who can't mind their own business and insert sexuality into places where it doesn't belong?
Well, it shouldn't, it doesn't, and Breastfeeding Mama Talk is fed up with it. Under a photo of a mother breastfeeding her child at a store, a member of the group wrote: "This is how a mother respectfully nurses a baby. With dignity and confidence."
"The way someone chooses to nurse a child," she continues, "doesn't define the amount of respect they have for themselves and doesn't define who they are. We are all human beings and somehow we are divided by something as natural as breastfeeding. If you choose to cover up, that's awesome. If you don't, that’s awesome too. The purpose of nursing isn't about who shows more boob or who doesn't. The purpose is to feed a child. And whether it's done covered, in a private place, or uncovered in the middle of a restaurant, does not define the amount of respect you have. The stigma needs to end. We are just trying to feed our babies."
The public just can't seem to get enough of shaming women for breastfeeding in public. It's often referred to as "disgusting" and "rude" because — hang in there with us — in order to breastfeed, women need to use their breasts. And since it's hard for babies to get at nipples through a wool sweater, that means boobs need to come out into the open air.
As with many controversies, this issue is between one group of people who are just trying to live their lives and another group of people who feel like other people's personal lives and intimate decisions should revolve around what makes them comfortable. Other people don't owe your personal hang-ups respect. Get over yourselves.
Being a mother is hard enough. Let women feed their dang babies.
