It’s not just the kids who have to learn to play nice at school. When we graduated, we thought the days of having to get along with people we didn’t naturally gel with were behind us. And then we became parents. Just as our children have to learn how to navigate new social situations each year at school, so do we each morning as we run into the other moms and dads at drop-off.
We’ve all got to get along (at least until our kids are old enough to hop out of the car without us having to unbuckle and walk in). But that doesn't mean we can’t laugh at the fact that most of us are guilty of at least one of these mom stereotypes each morning (Hi, I'm the sappy mom, nice to meet you). Check out the 10 types of moms you’ll meet:
The PTA Mom
Armed with her signup sheet and a smile that would make Maleficent proud, this mom is a genius at getting you to agree to things you don't actually have time for. Quick, avoid eye contact before you agree to bake cupcakes again.
The Gossip
This mom loves drama more than Bravo. She always has inside scoop on what's going on behind the scenes at school and isn't above spreading rumors about parents, too. She's entertaining, except when she looks over while talking to someone else. Oh no, wait — is she talking about you?
The MLM Mom
The conversation always starts off innocently enough — asking about the kids, or what's going on in your life. Then suddenly she's telling you how tired you look and how she has oils that can help or showing you photos of leggings covered in cats that "would look great on you!" even though you're more of a dog person. Who wants eyelashes so long they get tangled together when they blink anyway? Quick, to the car, she's coming.
The Phone Mom
Whether she’s rapid-fire texting or saying, "Yes, uh-huh, sure, No!" to whoever’s on the other end, this mom is never not on her phone in the mornings. Since she's never free to chat you imagine she's got a super important job, like heart surgeon or international stockbroker that requires constant communications. Or maybe she's a spy.
The Teacher’s Pet
This mom comes in every morning and attaches herself to the teacher, asking pointless questions about her child, the day's schedule, or if there’s anything she can do to help in the classroom. Doesn't she realize the gold stars are only for the kids?
The Fit Mom
Yoga pants are the best for quickly running the kids to school, but the fit mom is the one who actually puts them to use after drop-off. Sipping her protein shake while checking the time with a flick of her impressive bicep, she’s a constant reminder that you really should sign up for that Zumba class.
The Clique
These moms stand in a tight circle every morning while loudly discussing their plans for playdates and a girls' night out. If friendship bracelets for adults were a thing, they'd totally wear them. You want to pretend their invented popularity is so high school, but there’s a tiny part of you that wishes they were accepting new members.
The Ghost Mom
This mom is in and out of the school so fast you’re not even sure what she really looks like. The only way you know she’s around is because you sometimes smell a hint of her shampoo as she sails by on the way back to the car. Perhaps one day you’ll get her name, and her trick for getting in and out the door so fast.
The Veteran
With multiple kids happily running off to meet their teachers, a calm toddler in hand, and a sleeping baby strapped to her chest, you're in awe at the way this mom makes parenting look so easy. Is having more kids the secret? Maybe you should try to get pregnant again.
The Sappy Mom
This mom acts like she's dropping her child off for deployment, rather than a few hours playing blocks, coloring, and learning letters. She insists on a hug, a kiss, two more hugs, more kisses, and some elaborate handshake thing every morning before finally saying goodbye. Does she fling her arms around him Notebook style every day at pickup?