A New Jersey family says they are hurt and still in shock nearly a week after a priest allegedly kicked their 7-year-old son with autism out of their daughter's baptism. The reason? He was "a distraction." According to the boy's parents, Julia and Marc Vicidomini, the incident happened Saturday at Christ the King Church in Hillside — and it left them both so rattled, they've since decided to leave that church.
Nicky, who is nonverbal, was reportedly playing with a ball when the priest snapped at him.
Julia shared the story in a Facebook post that has since been made private, along with a video taken moments before the incident, according to People. In her post, the mother admitted that she "hesitated" before even posting about it, but she ultimately decided to share it because she was so upset by what happened.
Julia said the ceremony was a private one, which she'd thought would be better for Nicky.
But to her surprise, she was wrong.
"When I confirmed the date of the event, I was told it would, in fact, be a private celebration for just our family, no one else," she reportedly wrote. "With this information, I felt more comfortable taking Nicky as he doesn't do well with a full mass and large group settings."
During the ceremony, Julia's mother-in-law watched over her son as Julia stood at the altar with her husband and 11-month-old daughter, Sofia.
A priest named Father Luke officiated the ceremony, but he quickly became agitated by Nicky, who was bouncing a ball in the background.
On the video, Father Luke can be seen stopping the ceremony and telling the mother-in-law, "Get him out! Now! Out!" At this point, Julia tried to tell him that her son has autism and doesn't understand.
Apparently, that didn't change the priest's opinion on the matter.
People describes the parents as both appearing "calm" in the video clip, but they later told the new outlet that they were far from it.
"We were outraged," Julia shared. "We wanted to do something in that moment but we were in shock and didn't want to react in any way that was disrespectful in church."
So they kept quiet, and Nicky was removed from the church as the ceremony finished.
"Thankfully, Nicky didn't understand what was happening," the mother wrote. "He is a good, sweet boy and just complied when my mother-in-law took him out."
But the incident didn't sit well with her — or her husband, Marc.
Later, while loading their kids into the car, Marc decided to turn back and have a word with Father Luke.
According to Julia's post, it did not go well.
"He explained that our son has autism and he is non-verbal and doesn't understand," Vicidomini wrote, according to the New York Post. "The priest then began to raise his voice and tell my husband that he should not have been playing in church and that it was a distraction to him trying to perform the baptismal ceremony."
Even worse? "Instead of apologizing, [the priest] began to try to justify the reason he kicked our child out, again saying he was distracting him," the mother continued.
The New Jersey mother said that leaving the church was especially painful because she's been a parishioner there since childhood.
"I have never had a negative experience and thought nothing of having my third child baptized in this church like the others," she wrote.
She also can't get over the priest's lack of sensitivity, particularly when it comes to children.
"The Bible speaks of welcoming all God's children!" she explained. "Where is the compassion and plain human decency? [The priest] needs to be more sensitive and respectful in addressing a child, especially one with special needs."
It's for that reason, she wrote, that she intends to withdraw from Christ the King "and find a church that is more accommodating to children with special needs."
Even if Father Luke has yet to issue an apology, the Archdiocese of Newark has.
In a statement provided to ABC News, the organization wrote:
"On behalf of the parish and the Archdiocese of Newark, we offer our heartfelt apologies for the abrupt behavior demonstrated by one of our pastors on Saturday during a private family ceremony. The pastor was unaware that the sibling playing in a nearby candle room during the ceremony has autism. The pastor did not understand the child's behavior, he felt unprepared to respond appropriately, and his reaction to the situation was not pastoral. He acknowledges and is regretful for the mistake. Our Archdiocesan Office for Pastoral Ministry with Persons with Disabilities is in touch with the family to support healing and moving forward together, and we are working with all to come to a pastoral resolution and to ensure that there is greater awareness in working with individuals with disabilities and their families."
For now, that may be the only apology the Vicidominis get.
However, they told People that the outpouring of support and acceptance they've received in the last week has been incredible — not just from Facebook users who've responded to their post, but also from churches inviting them into their parish.
The parents say that their story may seem small, but it offers a greater lesson — not just for the priest in question, but for everyone — about accepting the differences of others.
Nicky has a rare condition called Sotos syndrome, and autism is a manifestation of that syndrome, Julia explained.
"Individuals with special needs need to feel comfortable being able to go out into the community in any capacity that they are able to handle, even if it means having a ball or toy with them for comfort," she told People. "The way our son was treated is just another example of how there is still much to be done to educate others of those with disabilities."
