Anne Peshka had always known she was adopted. As the eldest of eight children, with two other siblings adopted after her, she says that her parents were always open and transparent about her adoption, which took place in June 1966, but she didn't have much information to share.
"I knew that my birth mother was a twin, that she had red hair, and that her family was in the Air Force," Anne tells Mom.com.
She also knew that her birth mother was much younger than her father, and that her mom was placed with a Catholic adoption agency shortly after becoming pregnant in the late 1960s.
But beyond that, much of Anne's past was a mystery — until an at-home DNA kit changed everything.
Anne first started looking for her birth parents in the mid-1980s
Still, the rest of the pieces wouldn't fall into place until several years later
In 2018, Anne finally got an ancestry hit on the 23andMe website that seemed promising. A message popped up from someone who was determined to be a relative — and not just any relative, but a first cousin.
After chatting for a bit online, Anne broached the subject of adoption, and the cousin recalled hearing about an aunt who gave a child up for adoption in the late 1960s.
From there, the story just flowed and the details quickly hit home
According to Anne, she learned that when her mother became pregnant with her, she was young and unmarried. Though she appeared to be in a serious relationship with the birth father, he was eight years older than her, and considering the culture at the time, their situation wasn't ideal.
So they decided to place the baby up for adoption.
But to Anne's surprise, that wasn't the end of their story. The pair stayed together afterward and married just two years later. They remained married for another 25 years and welcomed two more daughters.
For Anne, the news was stunning. But it also left the Florida native wanting to know more.
In November 2019, she was given the chance she'd been waiting for
A meetup was arranged in Jacksonville, Florida, where much of her birth family still lived. And incredibly, Anne was told that both her birth mother and birth father were still alive and wanted to see her.
Meeting both of them after decades of wondering who they were was more than a bit surreal. But staring into the eyes of her two sisters — full biological siblings that she never knew existed — also threw her for a loop.
"When I walked around the corner and finally saw someone that looked like me, it was like … wow," Anne recalls.
The reunion was everything she hoped for
Just one month later, in December 2019, she even found herself celebrating Christmas with her birth family for the very first time.
That said, Anne admits that it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. Her two sisters, Jenny and Katherine, both found themselves wrestling with some complicated emotions about meeting a sister they never knew existed.
"It was not easy for them," she admits. "They were understanding, but it was hard."
Over time, their initial connection grew a bit more complicated.
"We were not the same type of people," Anne explains, adding that her sisters both have "a lot of insecurities" about her. "They’re more reserved, [and] I think I come across as just a little bit strong for them."
"Although we’re friendly, we just don’t talk like we used to."
When it came to both of her birth parents, the bond was more natural
Anne says she got along great with both of her parents, whom she learned were named Janet and Lawrence. Though they have since divorced, the former couple maintains a friendly relationship, and were happy to meet her at the same time.
Anne felt a particular kinship with her dad (who goes by the nickname "Bunky"), and describes him as a positive person as well as a "glass half full" kind of guy. In many ways, she seems to take right after him — both she and Bunky love root beer, enjoy many of the same foods (including jalapeños), and have a similar outlook on life.
Many of the details in the health portion of Anne's 23andMe analysis also started to make sense when she compared them to her mother's.
"My mom and I have this unique thing where Novacane doesn’t work on either of us," she shares.
And in an interesting twist, Anne also learned that her mother's twin sister had given a baby up for adoption too, right around the same time she was born.
Ultimately, the reunion gave Anne the sense of peace she'd longed for for decades
And now, some four years later, she's happy to say that she still maintains a close relationship with both of her birth parents.
She has since learned that for years, Janet harbored guilt about what she'd done.
"My mom felt ashamed and thought her [birth] daughter would never want to meet her," Anne recalls. "She was also scared that her church would look down on her [if the truth ever came out]."
"One day I told her, 'Sometime you really need to share your story. So many people have either gone through the same experience, or know somebody that has," Anne recalls.
Eventually, her mother worked up the courage to do just that.
"A handful of women got up after she spoke and thanked her," Anne says of the moment her mother shared her story. "One woman cried and said she did the same thing."
"She had been upset she’d be damned for life," Anne continues, but "coming around to this made her finally feel healed."
The bond Anne shares with her dad, Bunky, continues to be a special one too.
"[My dad and I] talk every day, he tells me what he eats for breakfast, lunch, and dinner … and how he rides his little bicycle around the neighborhood," she says with a laugh.
"Had I been rejected, I think I would have been OK," Anne admits. "I wasn’t looking for acceptance such as answers."
But the acceptance she did get has meant the world to her.
