The First Time I Forgot the Diaper Bag as a Newborn Mom Taught Me a Valuable Life Lesson

RichLegg

For most of my life, I carried a purse everywhere. It was like an extra appendage. From pads, lipstick, concealer, painkillers, Band-Aids to granola bars, I was one of those women who had everything in her purse. It was a heavy beast but I needed it every time I stepped out of the house.

Then I became a mom and that purse became a diaper bag, a heavier, bulkier, and more jam-packed beast that would put an extreme hoarder’s closet to shame.

I remember the first time packing my diaper bag.

I stuffed it with a dozen diapers, a full-sized package of wipes, a giant tub of diaper cream, baby lotion, two bottles, three onesies, a small towel, toys, hand sanitizer, a blanket, a couple of pairs of socks, and some other stuff that I don’t remember.

It weighed almost 15 pounds. Lugging that thing around probably broke my back but it made me feel safe and secure. As a new mom, I didn’t want to be caught off guard, so I prepared for every situation.

I mean my newborn might just go through 12 diapers in the couple of hours I’m away from home, right?

Every time we left the house, I was the one who would make sure the diaper bag was stocked and ready to go.

It was a huge hassle. I don’t even know how I came up with what I needed. It was completely arbitrary.

One day, we were meeting up with some friends for lunch. It was the first time seeing them since giving birth, and I wanted to look decent so I took a while to get ready. As I was blow-drying my hair, I shouted downstairs to my husband, asking him to bring the diaper bag.

Then I looked at the clock. We were running late. I quickly put my jeans on and ran downstairs. My husband and daughter were waiting for me in the car. I slipped my heels on and dashed outside.

When arrived at the restaurant, I started to look for the diaper bag. I turned to my husband and said, “Where is it?”

His face is blank, “Where’s what?”

My jaw drops, “The diaper bag.”

He’s confused, “I thought you were going to bring it.”

I take a deep breath as I think about what to do. We were 20 minutes away from home and already 15 minutes late for lunch. I was about to panic and start a fight with my husband at the same time.

Why didn’t he bring the bag?

I swear I asked him to. But I don’t remember him confirming.

What if she gets cold and needs her blanket? But it’s summer and I’m not even wearing a jacket.

What if she poops in her diaper? But she already pooped before we left and she has a clean diaper.

At that moment, I look back at my daughter. She’s happily blowing raspberries and getting entertained by the other cars in the lot.

I said, “Screw it! Let’s just go eat. Whatever happens, happens.”

I felt like I was riding bareback, completely unprepared for all the things that could happen.

But nothing happened.

In the short hour that we spent with our friends eating lunch, my daughter was perfectly fine, no fuss, no mess, not even a tear.

She spat up a couple of times and I used a napkin from the restaurant to wipe it. That was it. We got back to the car and drove home peacefully.

When I reflect back on what happened, it was actually quite freeing. I went home and emptied the diaper bag on the floor. I threw in a couple of diapers and a half-used box of wipes and called it a day.

Even five years and another kid later, I still sometimes overpack and overprepare, but I know if I forget something, it’s really not the end of the world.

And in a way, that’s what being a parent is about. I can’t prepare my kids for every situation that could happen. Because eventually, there will be a day when they go out into the world and face a challenge that not even a fully packed diaper bag can help them with.

And the best way to be ready for that is by being ready to adapt.