Gentle parenting is having a moment. Everyone’s talking about it. Whether they are trying out the approach in their own homes or offering criticism for what they believe is allowing children to run the show and walk all over their parents. But for all the conversation, the parenting style is so new, people still need quite a few examples of what gentle parenting actually is and how parents can implement these tactics in their own lives.
One mom, who is a positive and gentle parenting influencer, recently discussed how she uses the word "no" with her parenting style. While Gigi does use the word no, she does so sparingly, often choosing redirection rather than simply trying to shut down her child’s natural curiosity and exploration.
Instead of immediately saying no, Gigi considers what her child may want.
She shared an example of her daughter pushing her high chair across the floor in her home. It wasn’t something she wanted her to continue doing. But instead of saying, “No,” or “Stop,” she considered what her daughter may have actually wanted in that moment. She told her, “The high chair is for sitting.” Then she asked her, “Do you want something to push?”
She offers an alternative.
Gigi offers her daughter a play stroller that she can push around the room. She asks her child if she can wait for her while she gets a stroller so she can push it. Gigi put the high chair back where it belonged and her daughter was able to continue pushing a more appropriate object. A win-win.
Getting down to your child's eye level is encouraged.
Gigi explains that she uses this method in nonemergency situations. She stresses the importance of getting down on your child’s level and making eye contact. She identifies their desires (in this case, pushing), then, she rephrases the statement, emphasizing what they can do instead of what they cannot.
She says the method decreases the likelihood of a meltdown.
According to Gigi, this approach decreases the chances of a meltdown. But she did say that in the case of an emergency, a passionate "No" would work well. In everyday instances like this, she believes gentle, loving redirections can help to establish healthy boundaries with our children.
Many have thanked Gigi for her work.
Many people appreciated seeing the strategy and thanked Gigi for sharing, calling it "healing" for those of us who had parents that weren’t so gentle.
“Your posts truly help heal my inner child,” one user wrote. "Coming from house where i got yelled at and smacked for accidentally spilling water (as a child), i strive to be a gentle parent when I’m older!!"
