Naming a baby after a loved one is often considered a high compliment. Caring enough about another person to bestow their name on your baby is a big deal. We've seen quite a few tears shed by someone finding out a new baby shares their name. It's touching and beautiful. That is, of course, if it's appreciated.
Not everyone wants to share their name or the name of one of their children. A woman's baby tragically died from SIDS in 2022, and she understandably, hasn't gotten over the heartache of losing him. Her youngest sister is pregnant with a boy and decided to name the baby after her nephew who passed away. One little wrinkle … the older sister is not for it, and now there's drama in the family.
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The expectant sister shared the news with her sibling.
The original poster explained the story in Reddit's AITA forum. OP discovered that her little sister, LS, was having a boy and that LS planned to name the baby the same name as their older sister's son. OP didn't think this was a great idea and decided to tell older sister, OS, the plan behind LS's back. She felt it would be easier for her to take the news now than at birth.
"She said it was incredibly disgusting and selfish to do that knowing how fresh it is for her and that she does not want to see a baby with her sons name in the family which I agreed with. She was very grateful that I told her before he was born because she said she doesnt know how badly that would have triggered her," OP wrote.
LS intended the name to be a tribute.
She said she wasn't trying to steal the name, rather, she thought she was being kind to OS by honoring her son's memory. Unfortunately, OS doesn't see it that way, and now all three of them are feuding. LS isn't backing down no matter what the other two say and is planning to use the name.
"She says Im an a–hole for telling her since it was supposed to be a surprise at birth and that ‘seeing her nephew with her sons name would make her realize its a good thing’ and shes just trying to be a good person and Im an asshole for making them fight," the OP explained. Who is in the wrong here?
This wasn't about a name.
Redditors were quick to point out this isn't about name stealing. This is about a mother losing her son.
"This is not one of those 'no one owns a name' situations," a Redditor wrote. "LS is planning to give her child this name when she already KNOWS it will hurt the OS. How awful; I hope she rethinks this idea and comes up with another name."
"My sister and her husband considered naming their son after her husband's late brother who died from SIDS," someone recalled. "They checked with the in-laws and decided that even though it was 30 something years later it would be too painful and a reminder of everything their late son never got to do. It doesn't matter how much time passes, you carry the grief forever. Your little sister knows this choice will hurt your older sister and she doesn't care. That lack of empathy and compassion would be my final straw."
Others felt LS was totally out of line.
People felt she isn't considering her sister's feelings and that continuing with her baby name plans is cruel.
One comment reads: "A 'good person' does not, upon finding out that pushing a blade into somebody hurts, then continue twisting regardless of the cries. LS is a massive AH, nta."
This person thinks LS has lost it. "NTA. Your younger sister is completely delusional," the commenter wrote. "She had intended to use the name for herself the whole time, not even as an honour to her dead nephew but for sick attention and bragging rights. She frankly deserves everyone cutting her off."
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OP and OS are totally justified.
As far as Redditors were concerned, OP did nothing wrong telling OS the truth. She knew it was a hurtful situation, and it saved her a bit of heartache. Plus, they saw LS's true colors, and they aren't pretty. Maybe with time, she'll reconsider and honor her nephew differently, but not by using his name.
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