I’m a Single Mom & I Enjoy Mother’s Day More Now Than Ever

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Single mothers can have mixed emotions about Mother’s Day. Your joy at parenthood might mingle with the green-eyed monster. Why aren’t you waking up to breakfast in bed, or at least something better than the half-wilted bouquet of carnations left in the car overnight that seemed to be the best your ex could manage? It’s tough to still love this holiday as a single mom — unless you make an active effort to make it special all on your own.

There’s something glorious about taking the DIY route to embracing Mother's Day. Your day can be as relaxing or extravagant as you want, and you’re guaranteed to love whatever experience you pick for yourself. Say goodbye to the resentment old partners made you feel by not celebrating it how you hoped, and instead do it in the way you know you will most enjoy. This day is all about you, mama.

I used to have mixed feelings about this holiday after years of disappointment. But I now love it after taking back my power to make myself happy. Here’s why I still love Mother’s Day as a single mom.

It’s the Perfect Day to Celebrate Myself

When did you last devote an entire day to doing things you love? If you’re like many modern mamas, your answer might be, “Oh, somewhere around the time I graduated from high school.” The world has become increasingly demanding year after year, and it’s frustrating when you realize all your productivity gains haven’t resulted in a bigger paycheck, at least not in terms of buying power. As a result, millions of hardworking moms have to do more for less.

It’s gotten so bad that you might feel guilty if you don’t spend every hour when you aren’t with your kids working. However, you are not a beast of burden. You are a human being with the right to enjoy this precious gift of life. That means stopping to smell the roses, savoring the occasional blossom-filled cocktail, and giving yourself a break to live a little.

Mother’s Day is the perfect day for me to simply be, not produce. After all, parenting is perhaps the one human activity no one has bothered to measure on some productivity scale, and it certainly isn’t paid labor.

This day is a powerful reminder that once upon a time, people had intrinsic motivation to do what they needed to do, and their efforts were driven by love. They didn’t need supervisors or time-management software telling them how many keystrokes they must complete per hour. They did the work that needed to be done, then rewarded themselves with well-deserved rest.

Taking time for relaxation might be in short supply in today’s modern world, with its ceaseless demands to do more, more, more, even to the point where our bodies protest. However, I intend to seize it, and Mother’s Day is the ideal opportunity.

Reminder: Self-Care Matters

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Our modern lifestyle is why nearly 100 million American adults have prediabetes or have already developed the Type 2 diabetes, often without knowing it. How many days a week do you skip a workout because there isn’t enough time between work and parenting? How often do you forgo a nutritious meal and opt for fast food or your kid’s sandwich leftovers because there’s no time to cook?

Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s so essential to your well-being that the World Health Organization defines it as activities that promote positive health and help you manage existing diseases. It consists of the following:

• Getting moderate exercise: The WHO recommends at least 150 to 300 minutes a week or roughly a 30 minutes to an hour per day of physical activity like walking, gardening, lifting weights, or practicing yoga.
• Eating real food: Limiting ultra-processed treats is recommended. Yes, that means cooking is a form of self-care. Your best bet for health is to eat food that resembles what it looks like in its natural form. That means making time for meal-prepping and cooking dinner with your kids.
• Easing stress: Stress is at epidemic levels in today’s society, and it wreaks havoc on health. Unrelenting pressure with no downtime leads to elevated cortisol levels, spurring systemic inflammation and disease development. It also contributes to anxiety and depression.
• Hygiene: How often do you tumble into bed without brushing? Taking the time for daily grooming has more of a health impact than you might suspect, and being all shiny and polished will just make you feel a whole lot better about yourself.

It’s natural to lose sight of the importance of these habits. After all, moms frequently sacrifice themselves for their loved ones, often without complaint. But you can’t pour from an empty pitcher. Doing so spurs resentment, which leads to contempt, eroding your relationships with those you love, including your kids.

If you want to be the best version of yourself for your children and everyone else, you must put yourself first sometimes. What better time to remind yourself than Mother’s Day?

Celebrate Family

Perhaps the biggest indictment of modern society shows in the decline of the birth rate, especially among the wealthiest nations. The powers-that-be act like this phenomenon is a mystery, but mamas know better. Even animals in the wild stop procreating when the conditions aren’t right.

Sadly, the conditions today aren’t right for millions. For the past half-century, it’s been getting harder to survive on one income, and rising inflation coupled with wage stagnation has pushed many would-be parents into a corner. Many of us can’t afford the bare necessities — food and shelter — and children only add to the financial burden. Furthermore, those working two or more jobs to make ends meet hardly have time for parenting tasks, let alone enjoying their kids.

Family matters. It isn’t an afterthought, and parenting isn’t something people can simply do in their few, ever-shrinking moments of free time. Carrying the genes to the next generation and providing sufficient love and guidance to raise children well is the essence of life itself. It’s meant to be a joy.

But the demands of modern society often make parenting feel like a burden, leading to guilt. That’s perhaps the biggest reason I love Mother’s Day as a single mom. Come hell or high water, I’m spending this one day with my kids.

The day might start with a trip to the park and an easy activity for us all. Later, we might participate in a free crafts workshop, followed by lunch at our favorite vegetarian restaurant. Perhaps we spend the afternoon at the library, getting mani-pedis, or simply lying in the grass making cloud animals together. A home-cooked meal followed by a movie on the back patio might wrap the day up with a smile.

My dream is for every mother to have such a day to celebrate with her children — and not only once a year. The family is the core of what makes us human. It’s well past time that we restore it to its place of honor through sensible public policies that restore a healthy work-life balance and let parents raise their kids as nature intended.

As a Single Mom, I Love Mother’s Day More Than Ever

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My status as a single mom doesn’t mean skipping out on Mother’s Day because there’s no one there to do things for me. Quite the opposite — I honor this day more than ever.

I still love Mother’s Day as a single mom because now, I get to do exactly what I want to do to recognize my journey as a mom, and you can, too. Dedicate this one day to yourself and your family, taking the rest and celebration you deserve.