Every new school year offers opportunities for new experiences, new friends, and learning the routines of a new teacher. The transition from elementary school to middle school, however, is basically all of those new experiences on steroids! Not only is there usually a whole new building to learn, but it's also the first time most kids have had to switch classes and have multiple teachers. Add all those new puberty hormones to the mix, and it's no wonder that kids and parents get really nervous about this transition.
Thankfully, there are amazing people who love the challenges of this stage and want to spend all day with sixth through eighth graders. Yes, we are kind of in awe of the patience and kindness needed to be a great middle school teacher! We talked to middle school teachers from all over the country to get their best tips on how both parents and kids can make the transition to middle school go a little easier for all involved.
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Go Easy on Them
“Here is a tip for the first week: please remember that your middle schooler is probably going to be a hot ass mess when they get home from school. Going from summer time to suddenly back in school, learning multiple teachers, meeting tons of new people, navigating a new environment… they are gonna use ALL their emotional resources to make it through the day. Take it easy on them at home. Let them zone out on their phones and decompress. Trust me as a teacher and a mom on that!” — Kelly S., Arizona
Period Plan Ahead
"Please send your daughter with the info she needs (and maybe a pad and some underwear hidden in her backpack) for what to do if she gets her first period at school. It is SO SO SO common and it isn’t a big deal for teachers (or school nurses like me) but it can be really traumatic if they aren’t sure what to do." — Kathleen D., Washington
Reach Out (Kindly)
"Don’t be afraid to reach out to the teachers if you have questions, but please do it kindly! We’re also really stressed the first few weeks and we might not know exactly who your kid is if you reach out the first week, so make sure to tell us what class they are in and what period, if you can." — Ricki B., Iowa
Talk About Body Diversity
"Maybe talk to your kids about body diversity? The puberty fairy does not visit all houses equally so it’s not uncommon to have a 6th grader who is almost six feet tall or a 7th grader who still sounds like a little kid. Kids can feel weird about their changing bodies and the body differences are more pronounced in middle school, I think. Normalize that middle schoolers come in all sizes and that, yes, some of them have mustaches!" — Erin W., California
New Identities are Normal
"I’ve been teaching junior high for 35 years (retiring this year!) and one thing that has really changed is how comfortable kids are with exploring different sexual or gender identities. I had one class last year where I swear every girl identified as something OTHER than straight. Some of them will give themselves different labels every month, I swear. Parents get really stressed about how to handle all this ‘right’ but they really just need to give the kid space to figure it out. It isn’t nearly as big of a deal as it used to be, socially speaking." — Patty O., Minnesota
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Learning Over Grades
"Remember that the whole point of school is to learn, not just to get good grades! Some kids really start to stress about grades and college applications in middle school and they really don't need to! Focus on mastering skills (especially in stackable classes like math and foreign language) so they'll be prepared for high school." — Stephanie R., Utah
Homework Help
"One of the big jumps in middle school is with homework. They’ll start having more long term projects like reports and less busy work like worksheets. This is a good time to start teaching them to use a planner and to break bigger projects down into smaller pieces." — Jessa F., Michigan
Stop Texting!
"I spend so much time trying to regulate phones in my classes and one of the worst offenders for sending texts during the school day are parents. STOP TEXTING YOUR KIDS DURING SCHOOL FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. Especially during the start of the school year when we are setting the tone and developing habits. Please, I’m begging you." — Lauren E., Iowa
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Make Sure They Sleep
"I'm really shocked at how many parents stop enforcing a bedtime in middle school. Trust me, these kids still really need that sleep and need parents who'll take their phones away and make sure they get those 8-9 hours a night. It really impacts their ability to learn and behavior." – Deena T., Minnesota
Stay Off the Apps
"If you can keep your middle schoolers off of social media apps, they’ll miss out on so much of the really awful friendship stuff. Instagram (for girls) and TikTok (for boys) are the two apps I wish didn’t exist because they cause so much dumb drama and stupid pranks." — Matt C, New Mexico
Talk to Us
"Sometimes middle schoolers get shy about asking teachers for help. Please encourage your kid to ask for help. We might not know them as well as their 5th grade teacher did, but we do care and we want to help." — Erin S., South Dakota
Join a Club or Sport
"One of the fun things about middle school is that there are more sports and clubs to join. Encourage your kid to join something that they are interested in, it can be a great way to make new friends." — Uli F., Ohio
Don't Assume the Worst
"I think sometimes parents and kids assume that middle school is going to be awful. Sometimes it is! But sometimes that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy too. Try to keep an open mind and look for the good as well as the bad." — Rachel W., Minnesota
Take a Tour
"This is basic but if there is an option to attend an orientation or take a tour, DO IT. Too many parents and kids skip the optional stuff. It can help ease those first day jitters if they'd had a chance to practice their locker and stuff." — Sarah C., Arizona
Get a Good Backpack
"Don't assume that they'll have time to visit their lockers during the day. Those passing periods are quick! They'll probably end up needing to carry most of their stuff for most of the day, so a good sturdy backpack is key." — Karla W., Minnesota
